Strings Of Fate

Chapter 2 - Why me?

"Please, stay.with.me." Napahinto ako ulit at tumingin bahagya sa kaniya. Nakayuko siya, bakas ang kalungkutan sa kaniyang mukha. Humarap ako sa kaniya.

"What do you want?" Sambit ko habang nakatingin sa malayo.

"I want you in my life."

"Well I don't want to." If I'll entertain this guy again, he would be hurt again. And I don't want to hurt anybody again. I don't want to hurt myself again. I had enough. At isa pa, like I said I don't have time for this.

"Why?" Sabi niya habang nakayuko parin.

"Ayoko nang saktan kita ulit. You don't deserve a girl like me. May mas better pa na iba, so why don't you choose them instead of me?" Naramdaman kong nasasaktan siya sa mga sinasabi ko. Gusto kong umalis pero nagi-guilt ako. Kaya ayoko nang mang entertain pa kasi ganito nga lang nangyayari. It was a mistake. I shouldn't done this.

"Because I love you!" Bakit ba mahal na mahal parin niya ako? I am useless as f***!

"Why me?"

"Kasi ikaw ang babaeng pinangarap ko, at ikaw lang ang lagi kong pangarap."

"All I can do is to hurt your feelings tapos mahal mo parin ako? What a martyr. At isa pa, you left before so why you're coming back to me like nothing happened?"

"Wala akong pakielam kung masaktan ako. Wala akong pakielam. Ayokong mawala ka. At sorry dahil umalis ako noon. Did you heard my reason? No! Please, Caye. Huwag ka nang manirahan sa past. Magfocus ka sa present. Lahat tayo nasasaktan. Lahat tayo nagkakamali. Please, save yourself." And then a tear came out on my right eye. Bulls eye.

"Then why?"

Tumalikod ako at naglakad palayo. It is too awkward to cry in a public place kasi para kaming nag te-taping ng movie dito. Hinabol niya ako at niyakap ng mahigpit.

"Because I need to build myself. I need to be mature enough to love you, you are my responsibility and I can't stand for a temporary relationship. I want a serious one, so I left."

"Yes, you left a word unsaid. And if you love me, you'll never leave me. So don't you ever expect I'll come back to you. And I'm sorry kung naghanap ako ng better one, I realized no one's better. That's a foolish move I made that I will regret for the rest of my life. So please if you can just—"

"Please be mine again." Those words struck directly in my heart.

"Bumitaw ka na nakakahiya nasa public place tayo." Sana maging aware rin siya sa paligid niya.

"I don't care." Nas-suffocate na ako. Narealize niya na di na ako makahinga kaya bumitaw na siya. "Sorry."

Nagtry na ulit akong maglakad palayo pero pinigilan niya ako.

"Magpahinga muna tayo saglit doon sa Cafe." Sabi niya. Nagsimula siyang maglakad habang hawak niya ang braso ko.

"Hindi ako nagkakape. At wala rin akong pera." Pinigilan ko siya pero nakahawak parin siya sa braso ko.

"There's a hot chocolate with marshmallow toppings there. My treat." Hindi na ako nagsalita pa. Hinatak niya ako papasok sa loob. Di ako makatakas.