She whispers to tell him not to be too loud, but he remains to be stubborn and hardheaded. He yells at her like we weren't even there. Though I know he saw me already even before their fight. I was just a thirteen year old sitting in my room, texting, and there they were fighting over something. I don't make the effort to try to know what it's about. They've done this a lot of times. But now kind of seems more... Intense? I guess.
My dad has never raised his voice at my mom like that.Though, whenever he did, he wouldn't just walk away. He'd always try to apologize and fix things. One thing I observed is that he keeps on walking away every time they fight nowadays.
I ignored what was happening because I was certain that they'll get over it and go back to the way they were before. They always do. They have to.
As for me, I was just about to text someone good night. Someone that I adore more than myself. I don't know if that's a good thing but I can't escape the feeling. She's so beautiful. She sings like an angel. She handled a pencil and a brush like it was an extension of her heart and mind through her hands. Just like how a true artist would. She spoke words of life and she'd always expose the bright side of things. The feeling was beyond what words could ever explain.
Though I was young, I was pretty sure about what I wanted in life and spending the rest of my life with her was one of those things. Little did I know that love isn't that simple. What I thought to be a relaxing road trip was actually a crazy roller coaster ride that never really ends or slows down.
Before all this fighting, there was a time when we were all happy.
I grew up in a loving home. I never felt rejection in any way before because my parents believed that surrounding me with people who can influence me in a good way would be of big help and they did a good job at that.
It helped me build my character and know who I am and what I stand for and not just be swayed to do foolish things. But, just when I was thinking how easy life was for me, love comes in and life just got a whole lot sweeter.
---
It's 22nd of August, my older sister's 15th birthday, and I woke up with a smile on my face knowing what today meant. I jump out of bed to get things done early so I could surprise my sister when she gets home from school. Being home-schooled was an advantage specially with planning stuff like these.
I was just about to start reading my school books when mom steps in the room and sat across me staring into nothing. Lost in thought.
"Probably just still sleepy" I thought to myself.
"Mom, you look tired. Do you-"
"Son, sit down. I need to talk to you." she interrupted.
At that moment, I knew instantly that something was wrong. She covered her face as she started to cry. I was lost for words, Not really knowing what was going on.
She collects herself, lifted her head. Wiped her tears but each and every tear she dries, two more roll down. I was just staring at her from across the table. Unable to speak.
"They had been fighting again last night." I told myself. "Maybe it has something to do with-"
"Son," she said, interrupting my thought. "Me and your dad-"
"Oh shit.."
"We've been.. We were thinking.. Maybe..."
She didn't know how to tell me what I already know.
"It's not been easy for the both of us.. And.. In relationships-"
My mind went blank as she spoke. I hear and understood everything she was saying but felt myself drift away from reality.
At the end of the day it was me sitting on the corner of the room waiting. It was almost one in the morning. My sister didn't come home that day because she had a sleep over at her friends house. So it was just me. Sitting in the dark waiting for dad to come home. 2:16 A.M. I hear the door open and footsteps on the stairs. I quickly lay down and hide under the covers as if I were already asleep. Dad opens my door to check on me then closed it again when he saw me sleeping. The very second that door shut, tears poured. I cried that night without making a sound.
Same routine every night for the whole week. And every night he would go home even later than last night.
One morning, I wake up and see my dad in front of his cabinet.
"What are you doing?"
"Nothing, son. Just looking for something."
I hoped that that was. Really what he was doing. When I came out of the bathroom after I took a bath, I saw bags beside his cabinet. It was full of clothes. Though I didn't know whose clothes I already had an idea who owned them. But I chose to ignore this.
But then the day that I prayed would never come arrived..
I just came home from my M.A.P.E classes and I went up to their room to see the bags were gone and his cabinet was empty. Mom was down stairs on the phone talking to her friend as she cried.
I sat in my room as the light turns to night. I sat waiting for my dad to come home. As I sat I saw my shadow on the floor and I felt how alone I was. It was the worst thing that has ever happened to me. Everything just fell apart and it tore me up inside.
