Pasts and Secrets

Chapter 3: Prussia's Truth

"I'll read...?" A soft voice spoke, making the room jump. They then realized that it was Canada. After receiving a nod, he was handed the book. He glanced down at the next entry. "Next is America... Dear Diary, I don't see why everyone's always so serious. I am serious on the battlefield, where it counts; besides that I don't think there is anything wrong with enjoying my life. I'll go insane if I don't and I'd never be able to run my country."

"Ve~ Exactly~!" Italy cheerfully said with a smile. Many of the more serious nations looked between America and Italy with a calculating expression. Perhaps it would do them some good to lighten up a bit more? Even if only on occasion...

"Next is Alfred again. Dear Diary, Sometimes I really envy Mattie. His ability to just disappear. Sure, it must suck for him to not always be noticed, but he as the ability to be. Granted, most of the time he's actually noticed it's during a hockey game, but he can do it. Me? I can't ever get people to forget me, and I get blamed for everything, hated for the things I try to do right because of it. Sometimes I get tired, and sometimes? Sometimes I just don't want people to know I'm there."

Canada was shocked at what he'd just read. His brother wanted to be invisible like him?! But! But! No! Alfred was the one that he wanted to be like! But... Alfred wanted to be like him?! The thought simply didn't want to register in his brain. Then something clicked. Alfred wanted to be invisible. Why?

"Mattie, please read the next entry." Alfred said, not smiling for once. Simply looking out the window with a slightly melancholy expression.

"O-okay... It's yours again..." No answer. Alfred was still looking out the window, but he nodded his head in recognition. "Dear Diary, Today I was badly wounded in battle. My boss told me to pull out of the fight, but I couldn't do that. I got in this to protect what I love, and I won't give up now. Even if I die, I will keep pushing forward, because I'm the hero! There's no other way. I have to do it. If I don't, how could I rest knowing that there might not be anyone else who will?"

"Alfred, you idiot! You need to pull out when injured to recover! That way, you can return to the battlefield with your full strength!" England ranted, trying to get him to understand. Truth be told, he was actually worried that he would do something like that to his body; it was a bad habit that he'd seen early on, before the Revolutionary War, and tried to correct, but it seems to have only gotten worse over the centuries.

"Next is England... Dear Diary, It's all my fault. I've hurt both of my sons. I pushed Alfred away and now he hates me. I forgot about Matthew and caused him to fall in a constant state of dejection. I've failed both of them as a father and I deserve to be all alone."

Alfred and Matthew stared at England. Is that what he thought? That he deserved to be alone? That he was a failure?!

"Iggy... Arthur..." Alfred started, catching England's attention. He never calls me Arthur anymore... "You are not a failure of a father. You didn't push me away, not really. I always looked up to you. I wanted to prove to you that I could be strong and stand on my own two feet like you. That's the main reason why I wanted independence. That, and your head was starting to get too big to fit through the doorframe." He said the last part with a smile, letting him know that it was in good humor.

"Yeah, and sure you forgot me, but you make an effort to remember me! That's more than anyone else does! I'm always happy to see you, dad, and know that you haven't failed me, either."

England didn't know what to say. He just nodded his head in thanks. The words wouldn't truly register until he was alone. He wouldn't let them register until he was alone. He didn't want to cry in front of all these other nations. Yet despite his best efforts, a few stray tears leaked from the corners of his eyes.