To Love the Enemy (Ben Solo / Kylo Ren Fanfic)

chapter 3

I awoke with Ben still in my arms, he was fast asleep and for once looked peaceful, which was a change from how stressed he had been at late.

I watched him sleep for awhile, admiring the way his messy dark hair gently brushed across his brow, and his lips quivered slightly with each breath he took.

He was quite handsome in his own way, I thought to myself before realizing where my thoughts had taken me and harshly scolding myself for it. He was my best friend and best friend only. Besides. Jedi weren't allowed to think like that, possession, love, lust. Those things were not allowed in a jedi's life. And even if they were, I doubted Ben would ever like me in that way, but then again, we did share a bed last night, i scolded myself yet again for my reckless thinking. He only slept in my arms because he needed comfort and couldn't sleep alone. It didn't mean anything, i told myself.

I rolled over and looked at the wall away from him. What was up with Ben? I thought.

His actions had been odd at late. He seemed distant, and, almost afraid of something. But Ben was never afraid. He hardly ever showed any weakness, he was invincible in my eyes.

But the truth could not be hidden. Something was drastically wrong with Ben.
I felt arms tighten around me and immediately turned around to see Ben with one eye open staring at me. He removed his arms from my waist and rubbed the sleep from his eyes.

"What are you doing here?" He asked with a slight frown.

"You asked if you could stay with me last night, so i let you."

"Oh," he said, seemingly still confused.

"And in return for me allowing you to stay with me, you said you'd tell me whats wrong."

He frowned. "There's nothing wrong."

I rolled my eyes. "Don't feed me that line Ben. There's obviously something wrong. You've been acting off for about a month now and you barely ever show physical affection yet you refused to let go of me for the whole of lat night. Whats wrong Ben. And don't you dare tell me nothing. Its my duty as your best friend to find out what's up and make you feel better, so tell me. Whats wrong."

He closed his eyes tightly. "You'd hate me if you knew."

"Don't say that," I gently scolded him. "How could i ever hate you? And besides, we're Jedi. We're not allowed to hate."

"Exactly!" He suddenly declared. "We're not allowed to hate! We're not allowed to love! Everything we do is looked upon with such judgement and suspicion! We are molded to be whoever master Skywalker wants us to be! We have no freedom! We're all just puppets in his game made for his own entertainment!"

"Ben! Stop!" I declared. "Where is this coming from?"

"Well you told me to tell you what's wrong! So don't complain when i tell you! I hate the Jedi!"

"Ben stop!"

"I hate Luke Skywalker!"

"You don't know what your saying!" I cried.

"No! You're the one who doesn't know! You're blinded by what they tell you! You're just another one of his puppets!" He exploded with rage.

I drew back slightly hurt and scared.

"But we're so much better then this Siena! We don't have to be puppets! I'm leaving this place! Come with me and together we can defeat the Jedi. We don't have to be puppets anymore we can love, we can hate and most of all we can chose who and what we want to be!"

"No!" I cried. "Stop! Ben! I wont! I'm a Jedi and that's what I'll stay!"

"Fine," he spat a me. "You continue to be Skywalker's puppet. But I'm leaving here! And I will become the most powerful being. I will make history!"

"I don't know you!" I yelled. "You're not Ben anymore, get out my room!"

"Fine." He said coldly and obeyed my wishes.

****

Luke and i were the only Jedi to survive Ben's attack on the temple. It burned to the ground. But in the midst of the ruble was a simple heart necklace on a chain and a note that said just one word.

Sorry.

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~Sofia