Remember the Wrong One

Goodbye

Quick A/N
There will be some past tense chapters, when there is I will tell you, just so you're not confused

P.s. This is one of them
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Last year

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I can't keep doing this, and I won't. He told me, that he was going to get better, for me and Beth. So I gave him a chance and I stayed. I should've just left then. It would've saved me the heartache.

Now I'm sitting across from him after two weeks of not speaking to each other, in our attorney's office.

Santana volunteered to take Beth for the day. Beth has no idea what's happening, how can she? She's only six. I remember when I asked him, it's as if it were yesterday.
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Flashback
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"Again Finn!??" I yell at him

Beth was outside with Kurt, and Audrey

"I'm sorry Rachel, I promise that was the last time" Finn said

He's hungover, I thought he was at the gym but he snuck out to a bar. He's been doing that for the past three months. I'm sick and tired of it. It's like we're right back where we started after his accident. He's not even trying anymore.

"You said that last week," I say mad
"I know, But I mean it this time" he said

Just like last week

"No Finn, you never mean it, I'm tired of cleaning up after you, Finn," I say on the verge of tears

He stayed quite looking down

"I want a divorce" I say

Now I'm crying. He lifts his head up and widens his eyes. I cover my mouth and let the tears start pouring out.

"Rachel, please, please don't do this to me" Finn pleads

I just nod my head and walk upstairs
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End of flashback

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The next day I dropped off the papers at his house. I was staying with Santana, along with Beth, while Finn stayed behind comprehending what I was asking for. I haven't spoken to him since then. Which was two weeks ago.

Now I'm sitting across from him. He looks cleaned up, almost like before he started drinking. I looked right into his hazel eyes I fell for, and I saw sadness. Even if I hadn't been trying to search for something, all I saw was sadness.

I can't do this, the lawyers are talking so I decided to get up

"I'm going out for fresh air," I say walking towards the door

This time I don't look at him, because if I do, I know I'll break down. I run outside and sit on the front steps of the building. I put my head in my knees and I let out tears. How can I do this? How can I just throw away six years of marriage? I can't, but I also can't keep living the way I do. I'm so conflicted.

I realize, I don't want a divorce. What I want is for Finn to fight for me, to get over his alcoholism and realize that I'm more important than his booze. That Beth and I are what's going to help him get past his accident.

That's what I want......but Finn doesn't. He just doesn't care. So I get up and wipe the tears and march back in here. I've cried enough tears over these past two weeks.

"Ms. Rachel, so glad you could join us, please sit, we've decided the important stuff so take a seat while we propose the important step to the two of you" my attorney said

I took a seat and stared at Finn. The problem isn't that I don't love Finn anymore, because I do, very much, the problem is, I don't know if he loves me anymore.

"We've decided, that since you don't have a prenup plan, that you two can decide the money,"

Finn interrupts his lawyer

"Rachel can have all our money," he says looking at me
"No, I don't want it, I'll take half, and Finn can take his half" I say

The lawyers look at each other and write stuff down

"Ok...." the lawyers continued

"Now Beth Hudson,"

I look at Finn and he leans forward as we listen to what the lawyers have come up with,

"Since Rachel is not an alcoholic, unlike the child's father, we've decided that Rachel take care of her throughout the week, and Finn can see her on the weekends" they said

Finn had his mouth wide open,

"Wait what!?? You can't do that!! I've been sober for two weeks now!!" Finn pleaded

The lawyers looked at each other

"Wow two weeks out of a year, congratulations" my lawyer said sarcastic

"He's right, I don't want that for Beth, she deserves to see her father daily" I add looking down

I don't want Beth having to deal with that kind of confusion, I look up to see Finn staring at me. I look away, my lawyer writes something down,

"Fine" she says

After more talking, and more splitting stuff, it became late. I hate that this is what I spent my day doing. I grab my stuff as my lawyer says

"We will have the papers to sign next time"

I don't look at Finn and I just nod, then I head home.
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I was walking to my car as fast as I could. I bolted out of the door after the meeting was done. I was almost there when I heard Finn

"Rachel!" He said

I stopped and turned to face him

"What Finn?" I asked tired
"I wasn't lying, in there" Finn said
"About what?" I asked crossing my arms
"About being sober, I really am straightening up" he said

I looked at him and showed him a smile

"That's good, I'm proud of you" I say

I'm not lying either. I'm proud of him for trying to get better. But if he thinks that just because he's doing it now, that I'm going to get back together, then he's wrong.

"Now that you know," he started but I already know
"No Finn, I can't just forgive you, you hurt me and you put me through so much, I just can't forgive you that easily" I say

He looks down,

"I am sorry Rachel, I really am" Finn whispers

I bite my lip, why does he have to make this so hard? Why can't he just try to fight for me, beg me to not leave him?

"Goodbye Rachel" Finn says sad

He leans in and my breath hitches, but he quickly kisses my cheek. I pull him away and I look into his eyes and I kiss him on the lips. He kisses back and I put my hand on his neck to keep steady as he holds me

I think we both know what kind of kiss this is, so I pull away and rest my hand on his cheek

"Goodbye Finn" I whisper

Once I said my goodbyes I get in the car and drive off. I'm not even at the light and I'm already balling like a baby.