Nightmare (PLL fanfiction)

19. Home

I walked through the hall of Ezra's apartment building, 1B.. 2B.. and there it was, 3B. I took a deep breath before I had built up the courage to knock on the door. Ezra opened it immediately and let me in. I looked around, it wasn't as tiny as I expected. It even had a kitchen. His bed was made up and his couch seemed clean, his desk however, was a big mess. But what did you expect with a teacher? 'Do you like it? Ezra asked. I nodded. 'Do you want coffee?' he asked. I shook my head. 'No, I'm good, thanks' there was this weird tension between us. It wasn't awkward though. It felt healthy, I didn't see him as my teacher anymore. He was Ezra, a guy I knew, and it so happened that I really liked him, maybe too much. We sat down on the couch. 'So.. what happened today? With Becky?' I started the conversation. He looked at me worried, 'Aria, do you remember if we used a condom or not?' he asked me. I flinched 'what?' I said in confusion. 'sorry, I just have been worrying all day, like, I really love you I just don't want to be a father yet, I mean it's your choice of course..' he rambled. 'hey, don't worry, I'm on birth control' I laughed. Ezra let out a sigh, a weight fell off his shoulders. It kept replaying in my head what he had said, did he really say he loved me? he probably didn't mean it. He couldn't have. We've only known each other for like a week. That's not possible. Although it did feel like love at first sight. He probably just spurted it out in his ramble and meant to say "like". He scraped his throat. 'Well Becky, noticed you.. and now she's threatening to tell everyone, if I don't take her back..' he uttered. my jaw dropped and I grabbed his hand. 'What..' I uttered, Ezra nodded in silence. 'Will you.. take her back?' I asked him, afraid of what the answer would be. He took a deep breath. 'I guess I don't really have a choice.. but my heart will be with you' he uttered, and he smiled as a tear fell down his face. I wiped it away. He leaned in for a kiss and our lips touched, I started to tear up as I realized this might be our last time. 'Will you keep seeing me?' I whispered. He nodded. 'Of course, if you don't mind hiding.' He stated. 'I don't, I have been hiding all my life' I said. 'Aren't you tired of hiding then?' he asked me, wiping the tears away, squeezing my hand. 'You get used to it' I smiled. 'What about your home? Does that feel like hiding?' he asked me. 'If you mean the place I live in, yeah, that feels like the most hiding I've ever done' I told him, I was now full-on crying but I didn't care anymore. He came closer to me and pulled my legs over his. He looked at me and said, 'Where is home for you?' I quietly looked down, 'Well - I live in a place, with my parents and little brother where I wake up in my pink sheets, I cook in that kitchen and watch the seasons change from the window in my bedroom. I write from a desk I found at an antique store, I escape on the couch there, curled up with books of adventures and wanderlust, but that's not my home. Home is where you feel safe, where your thoughts don't drive you crazy, where you don't feel watched.' My voice was raspy, he just stared at me, encouraging me to go on. I took a deep breath, knowing that what I was about to say would change everything. 'Home is when I hear your laugh, home is your hand intertwined with mine, home is you reading the same books as I do, People make a home, not rooms filled with things. I was barely living anymore when I walked into your classroom that first day. I almost felt like dying in the club. And now, with you - I'm alive. So to answer your question, home is wherever I'm with you.'

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