If Only

Chapter 14

Glaring at him, he sighed before backing off and leaving, along with everyone else. No one glanced back, not even once. They left with nothing more to say. I sighed as well, looking at my arms that were particularly scarred from the fall I had taken. If only I had my weapons in me, I could have saved Sideswipe. I always protected others, and somehow myself. How did I screw up this time?

And what of Wheelie? Did he escape? Nothing was spoken of him. I don't even recall seeing the bot once the battle began, actually. Maybe he left to call base, which I why I ended up here. Now I am blamed for Sideswipe's kidnapping. Just what more could go wrong?

***
The medical room all together was stressful, with their constant checkups and poking with needles. I was getting tired of the care. My time being alone got me accustomed to taking care of myself. Even though I needed to keep my head low, I could aquire bandage wraps and other medical supplies from the local drug store. Anything to keep my wounds from getting infected was fine.

The loss of my phone was unsettling, with even the short time being here gave me the idea that I might have left it in the seat of Sideswipe's alt' form. But, if that were true, I could track the signal of my phone back to his position. In order to find the lost bot'.

Then again, I am blamed for the kidnapping of said bot, Optimus would probably not allow me to go along to retrieve him. Not like I follow rules anyhow. My helmet and bombs were what had protected me from the large metal creatures in the first place, and I'm afraid without them and with just a measly gun, I'm useless.

Useless is a harsh term, one I don't like to condemn myself as being.  Even back then I didn't say it, or think it, useless, how belittling. I did fight the Decepticons, by myself after all. N.E.S.T may not think of it as great, but I'm proud.

If I'm going to find Sideswipe though, I need my weapons. I can't continue on as just a hacker. This is demeaning, I am more than a simple coder. Considering I am also at a high tech base, I might have access to better resources as well go rebuild my helmet, and bombs.

Glancing around the room, taking in the silence, I slip off the IV in my arm, mindful of my bandages, and stand up. Slightly disoriented, I gather myself and stumble to the door. I first check the halls, to see no one is around and rush to my dorm, in order to put on some newer clothing.

Once changing, I reach the area where my computer had been locked up to see a coded lock, shutting the door tightly. Recalling the file I had hacked into earlier, N.E.S.T kept their passwords loaded onto their files.

Crawling back to my bunker, sticking close to the wall to avoid people, I sit on my chair by the desk. Coding through the files through N.E.S.T, I find what I am looking for.

Finding the pass code, I sneak back to the door to unlock it. The room carried the remnants of weapons recovered from my house. Those, however, were the extras I found from battle and weren't mine. Shifting them away, l located my helmet and two other guns special to me.

Flipping the two rifles onto my back, and resting the helmet to my side under my arm, I pick up another gun other than mine to use for when I rebuild mine. Dismantling it shouldn't be too hard, but without proper supplies forges a problem. Looks like I'll have to be breaking into a few other rooms at N.E.S.T as well.

Surprisingly enough, finding a few screwdrivers wasn't hard, not getting caught was. I made my way back safely and began disassembling the head piece first. The bombs were in the same place, undisturbed.

Taking it apart, I put it back together but this time the helmet went slightly over my shoulders. Carrying my bombs, it worked perfect for what I was using it for. The guns I did the same, although I didn't need them changed too much, I only wanted them a bit larger.

Proud of my work, I wipe the sweat off my brow and sit back to admire what had been done.

Deciding to go along with the idea that my phone might be at the location of Sideswipe, I slip my rifles under the bed while I hide the helmet under a blanket. Taking a step outside the door, I trudge to the Autobot hanger, knowing I couldn't do the tracking with just the computers at my normal desk.

With the first sight of the bots' I could tell they're stressed out. Optimus had his face buried in his hands while Ironhide was pacing the grounds. Not many Autobots were present, but the few that were looked distraught at the loss of their friend. I would be sad if someone I loved was kidnapped too.

Jumping up the steps, silent to keep from being heard, I plop down. Tracking my phone shouldn't be too hard, I've done it enough times from the constant times I've lost it. The signal was emmiting from none other than Arizona, where I'm guessing the Decepticons base must be placed.

"Phoneix, get away from there. You've done enough damage." A stressed voice demands from behind me.

Turning, I see it to be Major Lennox.

"Wasn't my fault, moron. Get out of your head, I'm not to blame."

"Sideswipe should still be here, but he's not!" Ironhide bellowed, taking a step towards the railing.

"And what do you think I'm doing, Ironhide? If you actually quit being the idiot you are, you would see I am tracking him!" I remarked, pointing to the screen.

"We've already tried, his signal is down." Optimus began, walking up.

"No, not him. My phone, I left it. It might be with him."

"And why would you want to help us, hmm? All you've done is avoid us." Ironhide questioned, crossing his arms.

"I have my reasons." I reply simply, not wanting to go into details.

"Because you think you know, don't you? About loosing a team mate? Well you don't, you're just a girl."

Now that was too far, I glared at him before saying, "I lost my family because of them! I can't see a family be hurt, no one should feel what I did." Looking down, I ran my fingers through my hair hearing the others sigh. Before continuing, "I found the signal of my phone in Arizona, not where I left it. It could also be where Sideswipe is."

Just then, another signal popped up. An emergency beacon. Every military personnel ran in, in a frenzy and I clicked the screen.

"What is it?" Lennox queried, staring at the screen as I scanned it. 

"It's the Decepticons..attacking a city."