I have a me that i locked away. She cares too much, always has something nice to say. She wasn't built for this world. It would turn her cold. So locked her away to the back of my mind, so she can be safe inside. Every once in a while she'll find the door and come and help people more. But mostly she hides away, slowly fading away. And with her locked I'm always sad. But it's either be like this or turn her into this. And so while she's locked away somewhere safe, I'm locked inside my head with no escape. Because without my optimistic friend, the pessimistic homicidal/suicidal comes to play. She makes jabs and makes me doubt, my mother's voice with she shouts. Telling me things i don't want to hear, that disagree with my friend so dear. She makes me want to die, but my friend stands by. She pushes me to live on, reminding me to be strong. Helps me remember that i am needed, that it would be selfish to leave those who pleaded. So here I sit, breaking so. Enduring torture you just might know.
