Clockwork Dream

xvi Dreams of Madness

"What does that say there?" he pointed a slender finger to a five ringed brass dial.

"Three-seven-four-four-one"

Spider grunted, pulling out a little leather notebook to write it down.

"Have you thought about getting a magnifier?"

"Had one, broke." He didn't offer any more information about the subject.

After that he was a little friendlier. Leo trailed behind him doing anything that was needed, and managed to squeeze a few terse answers about what they were doing. By the time they stopped for a break Spider even offered him something to drink. It was dark and bitter, but warm. He took small sips as they sat in a comfortable silence.

Spider was giving him a strange look though, and he wasn't sure what to make of it.

"I knew how to fix the Holocore system."

Leo raised an eyebrow. It was the first time the other had initiated the conversation.

Spider sighed, taking a few more moments before he continued. "I knew how to fix the Holocore system. Hell, I put the damn thing together. I built this ship from the ground up, she's my child."

The unspoken question hung in the air, 'Why Didn't you?'

"Boy, tell me what those mists felt like to you."

"What does that have to do with the Holocore system?"

"Just answer the dam question," Spider grumbled, but there was no bite to it.

"It was like I was being watched at first, but after I started working there were voices, too faint to make out."

"What did they sound like then?"

"Quiet" Leo paused, trying to think of how to describe such a strange phenomena. "The sort of thing you would hear right after you wake up from a dream but still aren't quite sure whats real or not."

"What did they feel like?"

"Hostile at first, then just sort of foreign, then familiar, I could have sworn I heard my father among them. Not exactly unpleasant but I wouldn't have called them friendly"

"Hmh, that's what I thought."

"What do you mean by that? What's out there? Matthew wouldn't say anything."

"We call them Ethers, whatever it is that lurks in the mists. They linger on the boundary between life and death, or at least that's what people say. For those who have strayed too close to that border, the ethers give that final push. Its different for everyone, the voice of a loved one calling you to the other side, the voice of a victim screaming for vengeance, who knows what else. It drives people to madness as surely as a knife kills."

"Why did it effect me differently than the others then?"

"You can bet that there isn't a man or woman on this ship who doesn't know death. Some have made a living through killing, others have just grown accustomed to it, or narrowly escaped its grasp. The only people who are safe are those who stand firmly and life and are of sound of mind, or those who have incredible mental fortitude. I don't know how much experience Lazarus has with the afterlife but his head's so scattered he wouldn't last a minute. That's why most of the sailors refuse to go up there. Matthew trained for years to have the strength to hold onto himself. I suppose the captain just hoped that you and the other girl would be inexperienced enough. It seems that at least with you she was right. I don't suppose you've spent much time thinking about the other side. Besides, it helps if you have something else to focus on, particularly something you can throw yourself into."