"Why don't you just give him a chance?" My mother had said those words to me so many times over the past three years; it was hard to give her a serious answer, so this time around I stayed quiet. "He has kept this family together throughout this hard time in our lives. He's kept a roof over our heads and food on our table-"
"Is that why you're dating him, so that we have money? If that's why, then I can get a job and work after school and all weekend. I don't mind!" I told her eagerly, my words racing out of my mouth, so excited by the thought that Robert and Lance could leave.
"You don't need to do that, Kadie. I love Robert, not for his money, but for him. I'm trying to give you reasons to love him like I do, and if his money will stop you from being so harsh, then fine." She sighed, shaking her head as she elegantly stood up from my bed, and swiftly moved out of the room.
"Why didn't you kiss him?" Liliana demanded before she'd even opened the door to my bedroom. Then, when she did, it swung open with such force that it hit the wall with a loud bang, and rebounded, nearly hitting her out the room again like a tennis ball.
I was curled up on my bed. It was the following morning after mine and Jay's late night adventure, and I had finally plucked up the courage to text my mum about my break up with Michael, and tell her that he was the reason I ripped up the photo album. She texted back almost instantly, sending me comforting messages containing many metaphorical hugs.
Liliana dropped down onto my bed, so heavily that it was as if we were on a trampoline and my phone nearly fell out of my hands from the force. She was clearly trying to make the most dramatic entrance possible.
"What?" I yawned, rubbing my eyes wearily. Jay and I only arrived back at the cabin at 1am, so I was exhausted. I'd slept through breakfast at the food hall, and still refused to leave the warmth of my bed.
Liliana rolled her eyes, clearly annoyed that her entrance hadn't had the desired affect on me. "Jay was telling us about last night."
"Jay never eats with us in the food hall." I muttered, frowning to myself that the one time I wasn't present, he was hanging out with my friends, and telling them about our night.
"Why didn't you kiss him? He seemed pretty miffed."
"I don't care how Jay felt. I didn't want to kiss him." I still had my phone up in front of my face, even though I wasn't texting my mum anymore, as a distraction from the conversation, but Liliana took it out of my hands and fell on top of me. "Ow! Get off!" I laughed as her weight was pushing me further down into the mattress. She shifted to the edge of the bed, next to the wall, and put her head in her hands. She was lying next to me, and the look she gave me was like a mother's, when they know their child is lying.
"Come on, spill the beans. Yesterday, you were practically weeping about how Jay hadn't wanted to finish off a kiss that never started, and then when you're all alone, surrounded by the stars: the most romantic setting possible, you turn him down. I'm confused, who knows how the poor guy is feeling."
"I don't care how he feels. This isn't about him. It's about me." I rolled over, facing away from Liliana, and pulled my duvet over my head. Soon enough, there were a few rustles, and then Liliana was under the duvet with me, like we used to do when we were little.
She must have thought the same, as she wrapped her arms around me, like we used to do, and she snuggled her face into my neck. "Kadie, I'm your best friend, you can tell me."
The air under the duvet started to become hot, stuffy and unbearable, so I lifted us out into the open, and we both sat up properly, facing each other. "Some of the things he does remind me of dad, and then whenever he does the complete opposite he reminds me of Robert. Last night, I was about to walk off and he caught my wrist. He kept hold of it, and tightened his grip when he tried to kiss me. I know he was doing it out of affection, I just couldn't help but think about what Robert did."
She took my hand and then crawled down to my wrist, her hand spider-like, and it webbed itself around my pulse. Watching her do it didn't bring back the same memories than when I couldn't see Jay.
"Liliana, what if he is like Robert and, because I sometimes see qualities of dad in him, I'm blind from it?" My voice cracked, and the tears started to form in my eyes. Her hand let go of my wrist and ventured back to my fingertips, which she squeezed comfortingly.
"So, he reminds you of your dad, as well as Robert?" I nodded. "Then maybe you inherited your mums taste in men." I looked up at her unconvinced. "There's a reason that your mum cheated on your dad with Robert. I don't know that reason, but maybe it's because Robert's a nice guy-"
I pulled my hands away from hers and looked at her in utter horror. "Do you not remember what he did to me? What he does to me? How can he be a 'nice guy'?" I interrupted; outraged at the thought Liliana was offering me.
"I know he hurts you. But he doesn't hurt your mum. Or Saffy or Lance. You disobey him in the rudest way you can think of – what if he just doesn't know how to deal with that? What if, underneath it all, he has similar qualities to your dad too?" I shook my head, and couldn't stop. The action making up for the words I could not create. I just pointed to the door, not daring to look at her as she walked out and the awful thing she was suggesting. Robert and my dad being similar were not even on the scale of things possible in the world.
My hands were bawled into fists, and I thought back to the relief I felt when I threw my phone and my shoe at the wall I was currently leaning against. Would I feel the same relief throwing against the opposite wall?
I unclenched my white rock of a fist releasing some of the tension stuck inside of me as I leaned over to where Liliana had placed my phone, at the end of my bed. I picked it up, my fist enclosing it and the tension rebuilding again, I pulled my arm back and then put all my effort into throwing it at the wall. But the tension was so stiff in my body that I didn't hear the screen crack as it collided, or the battery fall out as it dropped to the wooden floor. Some Nokia.
I didn't hear the door creak open, or the guy sit down next to me. All I could hear was Liliana's horrific words: What if, underneath it all, he has similar qualities to your dad?
I barely noticed the tears splat against my hand like paint, or the guy pull me into a hug.
And I barely heard the sad words that soon ricocheted around my ear: "I wish you'd tell me what's going on. I hate being in the dark."
YOU ARE READING
No Problem
Teen Fiction"This was the secret that I had never told anyone. I had kept it so dear to me, that I had never written it down nor uttered the dreaded words under my breath." Kadie Meadows has regrets: these problems that are constantly at the back of her mind, b...
