I'm On My Knees-Namjin (boyxboy)

A Rude 'Forgiveness'

For the past few days, Jungkook has been avoiding me slightly at school.
He isn't ignoring me altogether but we're not as close as we were before.
Lately I've been hanging out with Yoongi and Jimin a lot, because they are my friends and I came out to them a long time ago.
"Can you believe that homophobic douchebag?" Yoongi grumbled after turning away from a jock who, for a few minutes now, had given Yoongi and Jimin disgusted looks just because yoongi's arm was wrapped around his boyfriend's waist.
Jimin stared down at his food, obviously tired.
Black was smudged under his eyes and his eyelids were drooping.
"You okay, man?" I asked, concerned.
He yawned, then replied, "Yeah, but SOMEONE thought it would be good to do FIVE ROUNDS last night." He glared at Yoongi, who simply shrugged and smirked at him, while Jimin quietly grumbled, "My ass hurts so bad..." Causing Yoongi and I to burst out laughing.
"What? It's true!" Jimin yelled, glaring at us, then finally joined in with our laughter.
Just as I had calmed down, I felt a small hand on my shoulder.
"Jungkook?" I said, surprised.
"We, um... Need to talk after school...Okay?" He asked without really asking and I knew he needed to say something important.
The question is, what?
Probably to do with me being gay, or something to do with Seokjin.
Speaking of which, he'll be in my next class.
After Jungkook walked away, I got some funny looks from the couple but I just shrugged, not knowing what to say.

Later in the hallway, Hoseok walked up to me, and asked, "Is something happening with you and Jungkook? He hasn't been around you as much and walked up to you during lunch. Are you guys having a fight?"
I sighed, and looked away. "Yeah, he just found out I was gay and he's super homophobic. Of course, you know that."
I had a flashback of when Hoseok first got with Taehyung two years back. Hoseok had been friends with Jungkook and his group, and had even gotten the nickname 'J-Hope,' but as soon as Jungkook found out about him dating a cute boy from their grade, Jungkook got angry, called him names, and had his larger friends get together and beat Hoseok up.

Hoseok cringed, probably also thinking about it and remembering the scars he still has on his knees and upper arms from getting punched and kicked.
I decided to change the subject before Hoseok got really sad or thought he was pathetic for not being able to defend himself from them, even though there were five big, muscular boys who were each at least two years older than him all beating him at the same time.

After Hoseok left, I made my way to my next class just in time to see Seokjin bent over, grabbing some papers.

I look down to see that I don't have an erection, I was finally able to control myself around him.
I sighed, then sat down.
When he stood up, he glanced at me then quickly glanced away.
He must hate me. He always acts like it, and we've been tied at the number one top score for our whole lives.
He can never look me straight in the eye. He hasn't had a full conversation with me since the first time we met. After that, I just stared, longing to touch him and tell him I love him, then hear those words back.

Of course, this will never happen, but a boy can dream.
"Okay, class. Get out your textbook and flip to page 142." The teacher instructed, and sat down.
Speaking of dreams, this lesson is so easy I think I must be dreaming.
Wait.
I got the wrong textbook!
This is my 5th grade brother's math book!
I groaned, then thought, This is going to be a loooooooooonnnngg day.

Shortly after school let out and I got off the bus, Jungkook ran up to me and said, "Let's go to your house to talk."
I nodded in agreement, and we walked up to my doorstep.
When we entered, my mom greeted us, saying, "Hello boys! How was school?"
"Fine." We both replied monotonously.
She can never tell when we are having a fight because we don't let it show. Neither me nor him wants to break her fragile heart and show her we are angry with each other. She always tells us to be best friends forever, and gets so happy talking about how good friends we are to all her buddies and flaunting our friendship on Facebook like all the other moms do with their children.

He and I ran up the steps into my room. He sat down on my bed and I sat across from him.
"Okay, what do you want to talk about?"
He looked hesitant, but soon replied, "I... I'm okay with you being gay... I know you won't try to get me to be gay and your friends won't... And you all have people you love..."
This offended me that he thinks we'd hit on him or try to make him gay just because we all are, but I'm not going to let him know that.
"...And I don't want to end our friendship just because you're gay, that'd be childish. So, let's go back to the way things were. Best friends?"
I smiled and reached out to shake his hand.
"Best friends."
His face lit up and he shook my hand excitedly.
"You wanna watch YouTube videos?"
He asked.
"Duh. You don't even have to ask."
That's how we ended our day, watching weird American youtubers and trying to figure out what they are saying with our minimal education on the English language.
When he left that night, I was a bit sad that he had to go but altogether content.
We had made up and that was what mattered, but I still have a certain someone to stress about.