Reading the Regency

Marriages - part 2

If either bride, groom or any of the witnesses were unable to sign their own name, they could make their mark, which was usually a cross. It was not unknown for an otherwise illiterate bride to learn to write her maiden name, purely so she could sign the marriage register.

The Bride takes her husband's name

"Happy for all her maternal feelings was the day on which Mrs. Bennet got rid of her two most deserving daughters. With what delighted pride she afterwards visited Mrs. Bingley, and talked of Mrs. Darcy, may be guessed"
[Chapter 61, Pride & Prejudice by Jane Austen]

English naming traditions meant that, from this point onward, the bride's surname becomes that of her husband. So, for example, at the end of Pride and Prejudice Miss Elizabeth Bennet would become Mrs Darcy. She would not have become Mrs Elizabeth Bennet Darcy, or Mrs Elizabeth Bennet-Darcy.

If there was more than one daughter-in-law within a family, they would be identified by their husbands' names. For example, where there were two brothers called John Smith and Thomas Smith, John's wife would be Mrs Smith, while Thomas' wife would be known as Mrs Thomas Smith. To complicate matters, if John and Thomas' mother were still alive, then she would be the senior Mrs Smith, and the daughters-in-law would be Mrs John Smith and Mrs Thomas Smith.

If the groom had a title, the new wife would be known by her husband's title, except in very rare cases when she had a senior title of her own. Even then, her official surname would change to that of her husband, even if she didn't use it.

The idea of a bride keeping her maiden name in some form was very rare. On the small number of occasions when this happened, it was usually connected to some form of inheritance from the bride's family and would involve the husband taking the wife's surname as a condition of the marriage.

The Wedding Breakfast

"The wedding took place; the bride and bridegroom set off for Kent from the church door, and everybody had as much to say or to hear on the subject as usual."
[Chapter 26, Pride & Prejudice, Jane Austen]

If the happy couple were not setting off to their new home immediately after the ceremony, then there would usually be a wedding breakfast. It could be as simple as a sit-down meal for the wedding party, where the guests would also be offered portions of wedding cake.

Caroline Austen, a niece of Jane Austen, described the wedding breakfast that followed her sister's wedding in 1814:

"The breakfast was such as best breakfasts then were: some variety of bread, hot rolls, buttered toast; tongue or ham and eggs. The addition of chocolate at one end of the table, and the wedding cake in the middle, marked the speciality of the day."

According to a cookery book from 1822, a traditional wedding cake, or "bride-cake" was a standard rich fruit cake recipe, with the addition of an extra pound of raisins, covered in plain icing.

It was believed at this time that if an unmarried person passed a piece of wedding cake (wrapped in paper) through the ring of the recently wedded bride, and put it under their pillow, they would dream of the person they were going to marry.

A wealthy landowner, newly married, might throw a party on his estate so his workers and tenants could join in the celebrations, and where there would be food and music laid on for lively dancing. House servants would celebrate the marriage of a family member later in the evening, with some wedding cake and a bowl of punch in the servant's hall.

The Honeymoon

"Immediately after the ceremony was performed, Mr. and Mrs. Ludgate went down in the hoy to Margate, to spend their honeymoon in style. Their honeymoon, alas! could not be prolonged beyond the usual bounds. Even the joys of Margate could not be eternal, and the day came too soon when our happy pair were obliged to think of returning home."
[Out of Debt, Out of Danger, Popular Tales, Vol. 1, by Maria Edgeworth]