"Instructions for Gentlemen of Moderate Fortune"

370 10 3
                                    


Have you ever wondered how the dodgy fortune hunters, who haunted the fringes of High Society, managed to insinuate themselves into the company of wealthier, more fashionable people?

The following article comes from "The Spirit of Public Journals", vol. 4, published in 1801, which was copied from a magazine called The Oracle. The Sporting Magazine, published in October 1800, also carried an identical article.

The article is aimed at those men who wish to get their foot on the ladder of Society with the least amount of cost and effort. They could have easily titled it "How to fake your way into the Season on a budget" and the advice given might have been invaluable to a character like George Wickham from Pride & Prejudice, John Willoughby from Sense & Sensibility or John Thorpe from Northanger Abbey.

I've transcribed the whole as originally printed, including italics where used. The only change I made to the formatting was breaking up the paragraphs into smaller sections. Underneath I'll provide definitions or explanations for anything that isn't immediately obvious.


~~~

INSTRUCTIONS FOR GENTLEMEN OF MODERATE FORTUNE, HALF FASHION GENTLEMEN, SHOPKEEPERS &c.

"As the winter is approaching, and the Court and people of the haut ton are about to return to town, it becomes necessary for you also to think of a removal from your summer campaigns, watering excursions, and shooting parties; and indeed, like the tail of a comet, you ought ever to be found in the train of your superiors.

Let not the lowering prospects and melancholy situation of your affairs discourage your revisiting the gallant, gay metropolis of our renowned isle; the place is large and wide, and affords many a hiding place to the moneyless wight. It is infinitely better adapted for persons of your description, than your small towns and villages, where the prying eye of vulgar curiosity spies out the least circumstance that concerns you: you may dine in one eating-house to-day, and another to-morrow, and so on, for a mere trifle, the whole winter round; but be sure never go twice to the same place, as you might be known, or your taylor or boot maker might dog you.— which your own prudence will point out to you, might be attended with inconvenience.

When you meet with any of your more wealthy acquaintance, you may pretend you have an engagement to dine out with Lord B——, Colonel C——, Captain G——, &c., and who on no account would admit of an apology for your absence: thus he will look on you as a great man, having a large circle of acquaintance, and by this means you will get rid of his solicitation to dine with him at Ibberson's, Stevens's, British, George's, Richardson's, Maurice's, Spring Gardens, &c., where, you know, every one (according to the custom of this country) pays for himself.

Should you go to the play, on an order from any of the performers, be sure to look sharp out for a box where some dowager is alone, or at least where there are no bloods of fashion; you may introduce yourself to the lady in the usual manner, by treading on her train when she attempts to stand up. This will make an opening for you to beg at least ten thousand pardons. You may then proceed to make observations on the performance and performers:— "How you saw that piece much better acted at Bath, &c." You may also observe to the lady, that if you are not much mistaken, you met with her a few nights since at the Opera, or that you met with her at Cheltenham, Weymouth, Brighton, or any other fashionable summer retreat; but do not attempt to mention Margate, as that place is quite vulgar and only frequented by Cits, Jews, and the natives east of Temple Bar.

You may affect to be half seas over also, but you may soften it down by one of your neat studied apologies, that you dined with a party of intimate friends, who never stop short of three bottles; and, provided you do not carry the joke too far, the ladies are not displeased at seeing the gentlemen hearty, well knowing that if they sacrifice copiously to Bacchus in full libations, they will not forget their humble devotions at the shrine of Venus.

Reading the RegencyWhere stories live. Discover now