sired • luke hemmings/5sos [au]

fifteen // mixed signals

I AM GLAD WHEN CALUM arrives to pick me up. Luke already jumped in the car we came in and sped off home, and I wasn't going to be able to walk. I could barely stand. So, I called my brother, who said he'd come and get me. I tried to add enthusiasm into my voice as I thanked him, but I just felt numb.

Isn't it funny how it only takes one second to make your entire world come crumbling down? I never thought about how much I have come to depend on Luke until the moment he left, which is weird because I never depended on Chace like that. But, as it happens, Luke has achieved to capture my heart in less time than Chace did, which only makes losing him hurt more.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Calum asks as we drive home, but I just shake my head. Talking about it will only make me feel worse. He sighs, looks at me briefly, before focusing back on the road again. "I'm going to murder him. He promised he wouldn't do this again."

My head snaps up. "Again?"

My brother nods his head. "He has a habit of taking things out on people, especially when things are out of his hands. He likes control, and hates that he can't control your bonding. That's what pisses him off - you just happened to be there when he blew up." His jaw clenches. "He's a waste of space."

I don't say anything. Just look out of the window.

Everything is so messed up. I kid myself into thinking that when we get home, he'd beg me for forgiveness and everything would be okay. He doesn't. He seems to be making a point of avoiding me, and even goes as far as sleeping on the couch downstairs so that he doesn't have to share a bed with me. I hope that it'll pass, that his hormonal state will cool down and he'll come running back to me. But, as he continues to shun me for the rest of the week, the hope soon turns into defeat. That's when the nightmares start again

I wake up screaming, and both Calum and Liz come to my aid, telling me that I'm alright and safe, and that no monster is coming to get me and kill me. So, they wait until I am sound asleep before deciding to leave, and a few hours later I'm up again, weeping into their arms. They reassure me that there is no monster, but they have no idea. They don't know that the monster is actually Luke.

It's strange, not talking to him. And even stranger when it comes to the first day of school. I previously imagined Luke being the one telling me that there is no reason to be nervous, and that it isn't going to be so bad. Instead, I have Calum, Michael, and Ashton trying to calm me down, while Luke sits across the table, his perfect face expressionless as he eats his breakfast. I try my best not to look at him.

"If they don't like you, we'll team up against them and beat their butts," says Ashton, and usually these comments would make me laugh, but they don't. I'm simply emotionless, unable to function.

I find it ridiculous that I allowed myself to get into this state over some stupid guy. But he isn't just some guy. Luke is the person I've been trying to get to like me from day one, and now it seems that he has returned to his previous passive, loathing, asshole self. It isn't fair.

"Yeah, and if that doesn't work, we'll torture them into liking you," Calum tells me, but I'm not paying attention. Luke is looking at me.

I stare back at him, hoping he'll say something snarky and funny, but of course it's false hope. He just glares at me, and turns his attention back to his empty plate. Calum looks like he is prepared to jump over the table and rip his head off, but I shake my head at him, causing him to leave the room just as Liz and Andy walk through the threshold.

"Luke, we need to speak to you," Andy declares to his son. It isn't a question, it is a command, and Luke obliges with a sigh.

Now, I know that eavesdropping is very, very, bad, and impolite, and I shouldn't do it, and blah blah blah. But it's only natural to be curious, and I know that they'll be talking about me. So, I creep to the door of the living room, and keep myself out of sight as I listen to them talk.