It's Not Wrong To Love You (boyxboy) *COMPLETE*

Chapter 2

Present Time

It's been a couple months since I realized that I loved Ray and guess what, nothing has changed, except the way he's starting to act towards me. He's been avoiding being alone with me and I don't know why. I mean, it's not like he knows I like him. Of course he doesn't. There's no way he could.

Right now the guys and I were hanging out in the living room. Roc, Prince and Ray were watching Takers, Prince's favourite movie and I, on the other hand, was just watching Ray as usual. Not intentionally mind you, I just couldn't help it.

He was sitting on the couch cuddling with Jacob while running a hand through his thick curls. I felt my heart twist with every stroke and my eyes stung a little. All I could think about was that I wanted that to be me. I wanted him to run that hand through my albeit nonexistent hair. That should be me, dammit!

Roc was seated on the love seat opposite me with his feet dangling over the edge so that he was facing the flat screen attached to the wall.

My eyes roved all over Ray Ray's features and I remembered the day I realised I had feelings for him. I had hoped that my feelings for him would disappear with time, you know.

I had hoped that I'd been wrong about him, that maybe it was just a crush and that it would fade, but no, I still love him. It hurt to see him flirt with other people... wait, scratch that, it drives me nuts. It infuriates me to see him being all flirty and coming on to girls all the time and I always feel a mixture of jealousy and hatred and I've planned so many murders in my head that I'm pretty sure I could have possibly been a serial killer in a previous life. It also breaks my heart again, as if it wasn't already broken and stomped on before day in day out with the reminder that I can't have him. That I will never have him. That there's no possibility of him and I ever happening.

I scoff at the ridiculous thoughts I'm having. Dude, it's never gonna happen between you and him, don't you get it, he doesn't love you, he'll never love you. My brain points out helpfully. Psh. Like I don't already know.

I give a humorless laugh before getting up and stalking to the kitchen. I grabbed a can of coke from the refrigerator and slammed it shut turning to head back to the guys, only to crash into something. I landed on the floor with a wince of pain. Ouch, my butt. Glancing down I was met with piercing light brown eyes.

Roc.

I was a bit disappointed that it wasn't who I wanted it to be but there was also something else. I don't know what it was but I had a feeling that I would find out soon.

[ROC'S POV]

Shit. I'm trying to resist the urge to kiss him 'coz he's looking real sexy on top of me. He's facial expression is one of confusion and damn, if he doesn't look cute.

He wasn't making any attempt at getting off of me so I took that as a good sign. I put my arm around his neck and pulled him closer to me. He still wasn't making any movement to get off, so I pulled him lower and lightly nuzzled my nose against his then leaned in the rest of the way.

I gently touched my lips to his, stopping to see if he's gonna pull away but he doesn't.

My eyes shut of their own accord and I move my lips against his but he he hesitates for about a second and then he starts kissing me back. His hands slide to my waist, squeezing as he moved his legs either side of my wait. I slip my tongue out and swipe it on his lips asking for entrance. His lips parted, granting me access and I moaned when his one hand tugged at my short curls.

Wow. 

I've always dreamed about the day I'd kiss him and how it would feel but oh gosh, did this feel good, unimaginably good 'coz my fantasies and dreams don't even come close to the real thing. I've had a crush on Prod since forever. Basically, since I saw of one of his YouTube videos before Mindless Behavior was formed.

I was still young then, I thought that it was envy I felt, that I wanted to be like him and dance like him but when I grew older the feelings also grew but I think he likes Ray Ray. I'm almost 100% sure.

It's so obvious with the way he looks like a wounded puppy every time Ray flirts with someone or when someone touches him. Not to mention the murderous stares. Now don't get me wrong, they would be good together but if Ray's too dumb to see what he's got, I ain't gonna sit around and wait no more. I want Prod and I'll have him and when I do, I won't let him go.

My lungs were screaming from the lack of oxygen, making me break the kiss and drag in some much needed air which I guess he needed too. We both pant, still breathless and I open my eyes to a shocked Prod staring at me with eyes wide. We stare at each other for what feels like years but must have been minutes or even seconds and I see as realization sets in and Prod scrambles off of me.

"Shit. Prod-" I begin but he turns and bolts out of the kitchen like he was being chased by hell-hounds, leaving his coke where it had dropped when we fell.

"Wait!" I run after him but by the time I reach the hallway I see his door slam shut and hear the lock turn and I know I won't be able to talk to him tonight. Fuck! He's probably mad at me right now. I sigh, head hanging low as a walked back into the living room of the hotel.

"What was that all about?" Prince asks, yawning.

"Yeah, and why did he run like he was being chased?" Ray Ray asks, still running a hand through Prince's hair.

"Did you guys fight or something?" Prince asks again, breaking me off my chain of thoughts.

"Or something." I sigh tiredly. "I'm gonna head back to my room guys, see you in the morning." I shuffled down the hall and heard faint shouts of 'goodnights' from both of them as I shut my door. I stripped to my boxers and walked to the moderately sized bed and climbed inside. As soon as my head hit the pillow I was out like a light.

The last thoughts I had before fully drifting off made me groan. I'm so not looking forward to tomorrow, it'll be so awkward with me and Prod not talking because of the kiss so add on the fact that we have a photshoot and an interview on top of my new problem and it looks like I have a full day ahead of me.