Let's Be Scared

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I have to find my blood thirst. I have to control my desire to kill.

"Okay... Rae? I think we should stop playing Mario Cart. You have a crazy look in your eye." Jonathan glances over at me.

I chuckle.

This is the only game we have played where he completely slayed me. Mario Cart. I still have the YouTube Games lingering in the back of my head and I feel like I have to give it all I have.

We haven't even started 'training' yet. All we've done is mess around and we hang out a lot now, without gaming.

Right now, he was finishing up editing a video. He had out all the equipment and the whole works. He said he recorded last night.

"JONATHAN!" We heard the shout from somewhere in the house.

I look at Jonathan and he has a pained look on his face. We hear the stomps through the house getting closer to his room.

"Don't say anything, okay?" He tells me.

I nod my head.

His door bursts open. A woman enters in a bright pink robe and hair pulled up into a messy bun on her head, like she couldn't be bothered to do it better.

"What is this mess! I told you that you're not allowed! This all must stop!" She starts ripping cords from their nicely arranged spot.

After she's done with his desktop, she turns to us. Jonathan takes my hand and pulls me up from the computer chair I was sitting on in front of his T.V. He pulls me over to the corner and pins me there with his body. I shove my face into his neck.

I don't think about our position.
I'm scared. I've never really been in this kind of situation before. I mean sure, my mom yells sometimes, but I'm not scared of her.

I can feel Jonathan shaking. I don't know if he's scared or angry. Probably both. We hear a loud crash from his mom.

"Clean up this mess and no more of this silly dream of yours."

She leaves. A minute pasts. We hear the front door slam close.

Jonathan moves back a little. "Are you okay? You're not hurt or anything, right?"

My hands have a death grip on the sleeves of his blue hoodie. "Yeah, I'm good." I pause. "Was that your mom?"

He nods his head and then a tired look comes across his face. "I'll explain."

I don't want him to feel obligated to tell me anything. "You don't have to explain. If you don't want to, you don't have to." I say. I want to reassure him I'm not pressuring him into it.

He stares into my eyes. "I'll explain because you mean something to me."

*****

After we cleaned up the mess in his room and seen how much damage was done. He had one cord on his desktop that needs to be replaced and his T.V is shattered. I'm glad there wasn't anymore.

We ended up going to a diner in town and getting something to eat. I wasn't too hungry, but Jonathan was complaining that he hasn't eaten in ages.

After the episode with his mom and we calmed down, things went back to normal.

"Are you sure you don't want anything Rae?" He's asked me.

"I was sure the last four times you asked." I chuckle. I have the urge to fan my face. It's nice to know he cares about me.

He rolls his eyes, smiles, and orders a burger with fries. We hand the waitress the menus and she walks away.

"So. Right explaining." He scratches his head.

"I already told you. If your not comfortable telling me, you don't have to." I say, trying to make him more comfortable.

"I think I need to tell someone. I haven't trusted someone in a long time. My mom has something wrong in her brain. She has a caretaker, but she became too much. The way she was today, she's not always like that, but sometimes she worse." He plays with the napkin on the table and continues.

"I mean, I still love her and everything, but sometimes it gets really hard. She forgets me sometimes. My dad has locked himself in his work because there's this surgery we can get for her, but he can't scrap up enough money."

He falls quiet. There's so much pain radiating from him. I move to his side of the table and hug him. I feel him stiffen, then relax.

"Whenever you need someone, you can come to me. I might now understand the situation fully, but I can be here for you." I say and squeeze tighter. He wraps his arms around me and sighs.

_______

Heyy!! Thanks so much for the comments on the last chapter!! I love you all! This chapter is kinda fluffy but no

So, my crappy excuse for this short and messy chapter...I don't have one. Lol this chapter is for you to know about Jonathan's life and why he's sad.

I know it's short, but I still have like 4 days left in a car so I might write some more. :D

Happy day :) <3

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