Well... I can't believe it. Sidelines is done and out and actually available for you to read. And while I will continue to edit this for spelling errors (damn acrylics), and formatting issues (fuck you Microsoft Word), this is the closest to done it's been in five years.
So. Fuck it, it's out now.
I started this story in April of 2020, during not only a genuinely awful moment in history, but also a pretty rough one in my own life. It was my sophomore year of college, one of the hardest semesters I'd ever had, and suddenly I was isolated, alone, and spiraling way too much inside my own head. So, like any college kid with a bad case of homesickness and (unbeknownst to me at the time) depression, I decided to visit my mom for a weekend.
And on a Saturday in April, I was sitting on her bed surrounded by old photos from her college days at Michigan State in the mid-90s. She had been an athletic trainer, and she handed me this one picture—her with two football players she adored (both of whom apparently adored her right back), and the graduate assistant trainer with a bowl cut so bad it was hot—and something in me just... I don't know. Caught a vibe? Not because those people became characters, but because the feeling of that moment did. The warmth, the closeness, the joy, the entire little world inside a single photograph.
From that one image, the earliest shapes of Noah, Fox, Will, and Fletcher started forming in my head.
This book has grown up with me. It actually started as an Episode Interactive story (yes, the mobile game—we honor our roots), which I fully intended to release and then absolutely did not. It has been rewritten more times than I can count, torn apart and rebuilt, researched to the edge of burnout and then rediscovered again. I dug through medical blogs, football forums, academic schedules, and UNC system calendars. I wrote entire chapters only to delete them an hour later. And even though athletic training is now a master's program and not a bachelor's degree, and even though some things in this book would never happen in real life, I hope you'll suspend your disbelief and step into this version of North Carolina with me—the one that smells like fall and sea salt and feels just a little softer around the edges.
A note on neurodivergence: I was diagnosed with ADHD while writing this book, and so much of that experience wove itself into these characters without me even meaning to. Fox's routines and intrusive patterns align closely with OCD, but he doesn't name it, because he wouldn't. Noah's avoidance, especially around emotion and vulnerability, mirrors my own journey with figuring out what I feel and when I'm brave enough to admit it. Will is the closest to neurotypical, but even he struggles under pressure at various points in this story. None of them are perfect. All of them are trying.
There are references to real colleges across the Southeast because I went to App State and fell deeply, permanently in love with North Carolina—with the mountains, the football culture, the sense of community, the way fall feels like both a season and a memory. The story itself takes place during the fall of 2019, following the real UNC system academic calendar, because that year meant a lot to me and felt like the right moment for this universe to live in. Atlantic State is inspired by that world, but Mariner's Point and everyone in it are entirely fiction, shaped by my brain, my heart, and too many late-night writing sessions.
Please take care of yourself while reading. This book includes content related to car accidents (with descriptive and graphic elements), injuries, trauma, the foster care system, and brief references to childhood neglect.
I hope you feel something in these pages. I hope you fall in love with these characters the way I did: slowly, then suddenly, then all at once. I hope this story gives you warmth, or comfort, or that tiny spark of recognition when a fictional world feels like home. These characters meant so much to me while I was writing them, and it is surreal and beautiful that they get to live on with you now.
Thank you for being here. I mean that with my whole heart. Love you, love you, love you.
XOXO <3
YOU ARE READING
Sidelines
Romance| He waited 1,093 days for her to notice him. She never saw him coming. | Noah Gallagher has senior year mapped out: - Tape ankles. - Ace exams. - Accept her promotion. - Absolutely do not look twice at wide receiver Fox Heeler. Focused, disciplined...
