I went with him to the airport, I wanted to be there when he boarded the plane for Australia. He was my best friend, I just kept wishing that I was going with him. But I couldn't. He was going off to swim in the Olympics and I was landlocked. Maybe this wouldn't hurt as much right now if I hadn't fallen for him. We never talked about it, we were always just friends. I don't know if he loved me back, I think he did. He wanted me to come with him after all.
But I had to watch him go. I couldn't even walk with him to the gate because the airport didn't let guests through. He had to rush to get through security but he still stopped and held his arms out to me. Without a second thought I pulled him into a tight embrace. I didn't want to let him go, I wanted to hold him close like that forever. I wanted to tell him that I'd miss him, that I wished I was going with him, I wanted to make him promise to come back. But I just said, "Goodbye Rin."
He had to leave my arms, he had to rush to get on his plane and I had to watch him go. I just couldn't help thinking that this may be the last time I will ever see him. You don't always think about it but this could be the last goodbye. When you say goodbye to someone and they leave, you might never see them again. Plenty of people come and go in your life and it hurts when you realize that you cared but you have to watch them leave.
I don't want to say goodbye, I'm not ready to.
