Dear Makoto,
I just want to say thank you for everything that you've ever done for me. Even if it didn't mean much to you, it made a world of difference to me. You kept me going even when things were bad, especially when I was alone in Australia. When people would do what ever they wanted with me, I would try to remember you, to help me feel strong again. I've never told you all the memories that haunt my mind but I somehow feel like you understood it all. I love you Makoto and I know you love me, just not in the way that I need you to.
It's not your fault that you don't love me as anything more than a friend, so please don't feel responsible for what I'm going to do. For me, it's just that things have compounded and don't get better. I used to think that when things broke and fell apart that if you keeping moving forward that you could turn back time and bring the pieces back together. No matter how many times I put my pieces back together, I fall apart again. And this time I think I've shattered.
I haven't gone crazy if you're thinking that, no that would've happened years ago when I was in the middle of everyone and everything. No this is coming from a moment of clarity. I can hear the music and the calm tranquility of it all. I'm doing this in a moment of peace because nothing really matters anyway.
Makoto. Promise me that when I'm not with you, you'll find a way to keep on living and promise that you won't do it alone.
I'll love you forever. Goodbye.
Rin
