What My Girlfriend Doesn't Know (Boyxboy)

Chapter 5

"Nathan, you're perfect. How could I not love you more?"

"I'm not perfect," I laughed, looking at my half-eaten ice cream. "If you think perfect is someone who is lazy and awkward, then okay I'm perfect."

"You're not lazy!" She gasped. "You're the most non-lazy person I know!"

"Tracy, what are you talking about? I'm so lazy."

"You play football," she began, "You help your mom around the house, you usually walk instead of drive....How are you lazy? And awkward, you're not awkward."

"I may do a lot of active things," I told her, shrugging. "But that's just to hide the fact that I'm actually so lazy. And have you seen me when I go to dinner with you and your parents? My presence just screams 'awkward'."

Tracy laughed. "You're so cute when you're shy. But don't worry, my parents love you. Especially my mom, I swear she wishes you were her girlfriend instead of mine."

I snorted. "Is that why she always insists I go over to your house?"

"Probably, I wouldn't doubt it!" Tracy rolled her eyes playfully, licking at her ice-cream before grinning at me.

"Seriously, Nathan, you're gorgeous you know that? I'm actually surprised that you stayed with me this long."

That actually made me frown a bit. Tracy's always had such a low self-esteem, and I know she doesn't understand why I would like her. She always gets nervous when we're out in public, when there are other girls around. She's always bringing up the 'I can't believe you love me' topic.

Tracy's a beautiful, smart, down to earth girl. How can I not love her?

"Trace," I sighed, grabbing her delicate hand across the table. "How many times do I have to remind you?"

"I'm sorry," she groaned. "I just can't believe this. Still."

"Why not?" I asked, furrowing my eyebrows. "Why do you feel like that?"

Tracy gave me a sad smile, tucking her brown hair behind her hears. "Nathan, look at you."

"I look at myself all the time. Your point?" I arched an eyebrow, wanting her to get to the point. I just don't understand how Tracy -- my beautiful, gorgeous brilliant girlfriend can feel so low about herself.

"You're beautiful, athletic, popular, smart....everybody loves you. You're so nice to everybody, no matter who they are. You could literally have any girl at our school, or even beyond that but for some reason you settled for me. I just don't get it. I know you hate it when I'm so negative, but seriously? I just will never get it. What's so great about me, Nate?"

I can't believe what I'm hearing right now. As I sat here staring at my frowning girlfriend, I almost felt my heart breaking at this. I know it sounds a bit much, but nobody knows what Tracy has been through. She's had a pretty rough life while growing up, and it really makes me sad when she can't look at herself and see what I see.

Because all I see is a beautiful girl, inside and out.

I fell in love with Tracy in our sophomore year, we were 15. Back then she was that shy and quiet girl who chose to sit at the back of the class because she didn't want any attention. I walked in late that day because I lost track of time when I was catching up with my friends -- it was the first day of school. I walked in, looked around to see who I knew....

And I saw her. Long, brown curly hair. Big brown eyes. Rosy cheeks. We made eye-contact for a split second before she quickly looked down in embarrassment.

I was your typical 15 year old boy so I pretended to not notice her. I acted like I wasn't interested, and pretty much ignored her. But man, I couldn't stop thinking about her. Months went by, and in that time I've hooked up a bunch of times and had a few girlfriends but even then I was always happy to see Tracy everyday.