Splatoon Oneshots!!

A Decade of Service

IT'S SPLATOON'S 10TH ANNIVERSARY WHICH MADE ME MOTIVATED TO JUST THROW 1K WORDS OF SILLY PARTY FLUFF ONTO A PAGE 😼

this is also the first entry in my book for silly and mostly short oneshots abt splatoon, i made it so i can write more to stay motivated and im putting them in one book ^^

🎀 my agent names don't forget em lmao 🎀

Captain 3: Cerulean Moon

Agent 8: Haru

Agent 4: Ember

Neo 3: Celeste

Agent 7/8.2: Akari (Haru's twin sister)

(i also have Quartz as agent 5 but he's only referenced here rip ;-;)

The captain of the New Squidbeak Splatoon groggily got out of bed, rubbing his head to shake off his morning migraine. "I have to buy groceries, refill my prescription-"

"TAKEN CARE OF, CAP'N CERU!" exclaimed Callie, suddenly breaking in through the window. "DO YOU KNOW WHAT TODAY IS?!"

Marie then climbed into the room from Cerulean's windowsill. "This was Cal's idea, I swear."

"Oh REALLY? Was I the one who wanted to surprise Ceru by scaring him by doing his chores?" asked Callie.

"Yes?" replied Marie. "You literally woke me up at five in the morning to go to the pharmacy."

"WHO CARES?!" shouted a new voice that emerged from the closet. "IT'S YA GIRL PEARL — COMIN' IN HOT TO KIDNAP MR. CERULEAN CAPTAIN THREE MOON FOR NO PARTICULAR REASON AT ALL!"

Cerulean's heart skipped a beat. "HOW LONG WERE YOU IN MY CLOSET FOR-"

Marina followed her girlfriend out of the closet. "This has to be a metaphor for something, what do you think Pearlie?"

Then, three more figures crashed in from the roof, causing a hole that will cost hundreds of G to repair. "HEY FUCKO, NO ONE ASKED FOR YOUR DUMB DRAMATICS!" shouted Frye.

"REALLY?" Pearl barked back. "DID CLEETUS ASK FOR YOU THREE TO BREAK HIS ROOF?!"

"It's Cerulean." muttered the captain.

"QUIET JONATHAN!" shouted Shiver. "Big Man, take this man and whisk him away to the New Squidbeak headquarters!"

"Ay! (Yes ma'am!)" nodded Big Man.

────୨ৎ────

Before he knew it, Cerulean was knocked out and woke up in the middle of a large kitchen table.

An octoling his age gently caressed his head as he gained consciousness. "He's waking up!" smiled Haru, Agent 8 of the New Squidbeak Splatoon. Neo 3 and Agent 4, Celeste and Ember respectively, just laughed.

"I got all that drama at his house on camera." smirked Celeste. "I didn't know Big Man of all people would smack his face with a baseball bat!"

The manta ray idol felt a bit guilty for his actions. "Ay ay! (Shiver told me I could get more lines in our next song if I did it!)"

"I would've done it for free!" grinned Ember. "All I would've had to do was pretend Haru was kidnapped by DJ Octavio or something!"

The large octopus glared at her, and the elderly inkling next to him spoke up. "Now now, Octavio's done with causin' trouble for us! Our wedding's this week, you know."