I am the Fire: Thranduil and Elleth reader fanfiction

Chapter 8

As the sun begins to rise over Middle Earth, you decide to leave the royal tent, giving you the opportunity to reflect on your dilemma. Not being able to sleep last night did allow you some time to mull over your future. Nonetheless, with every reason you have for returning to Mirkwood, there is a reason to counter it; to stay behind with the people you have got to know and love. Fundamentally, you cannot stand the thought of an upset Bard. Your departure would deeply affect him, along with all your other friends in Lake-town. Although you have no family left, the people of Lake-town have treated you as one of their own since your departure from Mirkwood. Nevertheless, curiosity lingers within you, like the shadows which cling to and cover the unknown. You wish to see what Mirkwood has become. For thousands of years you have been in Lake-town, it is in this time that your curiosity has grown to new levels.

Feeling overwhelmed, you quietly sneak out of the luxurious tent. Luckily, Thranduil had done an excellent job of healing you, thus you are not in much pain. If needed, you could sprint away. Due to the elven camp being guarded however, you decide tiptoeing cautiously to not make yourself known is best. Stepping slowly and silently, you make your way towards a rocky hillside. After thirty minutes you finally get to the opposite side of the hill and carefully start to climb it. If you had not gone around to the back of the slope, the guards would have spotted you climbing and reported your whereabouts to Thranduil. Therefore, with every footstep you take, you check that the campsite cannot see you. All you desire right now is to go somewhere that will rid your mind of distractions. Somewhere you can focus. Somewhere you can be alone.

Climbing higher and higher for freedom of thought, you do not realise how far you have gone, until you peer down. Down to where stones lie. Before, they were the size of boulders, but now that image is replaced by small pebbles and pieces of rubble. You have climbed high up on this mound of land, so high that the wind now feels like it is slapping your face instead of caressing it. Fortunately, you notice a small indent in the hill which will protect you from the wind's wrath. Once you are seated upon this small sheltered area, you free the imprisoned thoughts from your mind. Before, you were afraid of appearing weak. Now, the seclusion from humanity enables your thoughts and feelings to gain access to your heart.

Currently, you possess an array of emotions, like a paint pallet, constantly being mixed to create new colours. You feel anger when reflecting on Bard's commands of not to fight, he treated you like a curious but distrusted child, which is infuriating as you are far older than him! But then happiness starts to weave in; Bard, like many other men and women of Lake-town, had adopted you into their community. Giving you a home when you were forced to leave Mirkwood with your mother. However, Bard has changed over the past few years. Now, he considers you to be an ideal mother for his sweet children. This unusual mixture of anger and happiness adds coal to the fire, which is always there, deep within your being.

Next, you muse on the king of Mirkwood. Within only two days of meeting him, he has offered you the chance to explore outside the borders of Lake-town. The opportunity you have longed for since obeying your mother's instructions to never leave, as she feared for your safety after becoming a widow. Flares of excitement circulate through you. Not only would you return to Mirkwood, your former home, you would also be able to live in Mirkwood's magnificent palace for some time whilst you find somewhere to settle down. Moreover, you would be able to finally join the Mirkwood guards and serve your kin nobly. This buzz flushes the fire into a storm. 

On the contrary, there is still some anxiety buried within you, pulling you back, away from this escape. This anxiety you hold is formed from your phobia of spiders. Spiders never seemed so scary to you until your beloved father was violently murdered by one. Ever since his death you desired justice for him, you would have even given your life just to know that his murderer was dead. Plus, if you did join the Mirkwood guards, you would have to be fearless. Which you thought you were, until the thought of spiders webs itself into your mind. Once again, spiders have ruined everything. You are desperate to explore Mirkwood once again and live with your kin. Nevertheless, a dark, gloomy corner within your heart ached at the thought of facing your father's enemy. Suddenly, the storm within you settles and takes the form of a furiously glowing light. From out of nowhere, you begin to hear a delicate voice speaking to you...