Ezria; Gone Girl

The Truth

Arias POV

It's one of those sleepless nights where I can only think about the negatives.

For example, Damien should be barging in any second taking me to his room.

It's hard to think about the positive when all I can think about what's going to happen. The future. I don't see us getting out anytime soon.

I can only fear the worst. I feel like I can't even protect my own daughter, and that's a mothers job. To protect her from the asses like Damien. To raise her in a house with her family instead of one damn room that we've been stuck in for what's felt like ever.

All I do is wish, I wish hoping Ezra can hear me. Hear my pleads. But I'm losing hope more and more because here we are, still in the room.

There are many questions that run through my head at least one hundred times a day. The main one I ask is will Ezra ever find us? And has he moved on? Does he think about me as much as I think about him? Does he still grief over Scarlett and I? Does he still care? All these questions and more.

But I can't answer one.

I laid there not even realizing tears where streaming down my my face. I let out a small sniffle trying hard not to wake my peaceful baby.

But she's like her daddy, a very light sleeper. Before I could calm myself I heard Lottie's little voice speak up.

"Momma? Are you okay?" She asked snuggling closer to me with a tired voice.

"Mommas okay baby, go back to bed," I said kissing her forehead.

"You don't seem okay," my very smart daughter pointed out.

"I'm okay baby," I replied pulling her close.

"Momma?" She asked in a quiet whisper.

"What is it?" I asked softly.

"Promise you won't leave me tonight?" She asked hopefully.

"Baby, you know I would stay if I could. But sometimes Damien wants to spend time with me," I told the little girl delicately.

"But momma!" She cried gripping onto me tightly.

"Baby-" I started, but the angry five year old cut me off.

"Why do you always chose him over me!" She sobbed.

I sat up and pulled her into my lap but instead she screamed and hit my arms away.

"Why don't you love me anymore mommy?" The little girl asked as tears rolled down her face. This question truly broke my heart. She's my treasure, I love her way more than Damien. In fact I hate Damien! There zero comparison to my love for her to anyone.

"Scarlett Sabrina Fitz, you know that's not true! I love you with all my heart and soul. I love you more than anything in this whole entire world," I said as tears fell down my face. Can't she see I love her so much it hurts me?

She continued to cry and throw a fit.

"Baby, shh," I said trying to calm her. The last thing we need is for her to wake Damien up.

"No!" She screamed.

"Honey, your going to wake Damien up! Maybe if we are quieter than I can stay with you," I say trying to convince us both.

"But mommy-" she started as she continued to sob.

But than I heard Damien come in,"Shut your stupid child up! I'm trying to sleep!" He yelled loudly causing Scarlett to only cry even more.