Strings and Schemes

Chapter 18

His eyes flick over my sweatshirt, the way the fabric drowns my frame, the sweatpants hanging loose around my waist. He assumes. I can see the thought forming in his head before he even speaks.

"Didn't realize you went out." His voice is neutral—too neutral.

I blink, caught off guard. "What?"

He nods toward my clothes. "Did you even wait for me to get home?"

Oh.

I should correct him. Tell him I wasn't out all night, that I stayed after our fight, sat with my thoughts, and did the opposite of what he thinks. But I don't.

Anger curls in my chest. It is one thing to call me out when it's just us inside a private house, but out here? And, slut-shaming me for something I didn't even do?

I tilt my head, watching him carefully. Pissed the fuck off. "What's it to you?" I don't even recognize my own tone as I hear the words spill from my mouth.

His jaw tightens. "Nothing."

My heart falters.

I let the silence stretch between us. He doesn't move to leave, and I don't move to explain myself. It's an impasse, the weight of last night pressing between us like a loaded gun on the table, neither of us willing to make the first move.

I think about apologizing, about hugging him and begging for forgiveness. About explaining all the ways I wasn't allowed to want, and how that want was used against me. Then the door swings open.

"Raina, what're you doing here?" Liam says, rubbing his eyes like he just woke up. His gaze flicks between me and Zayn, brows drawing together at the obvious tension crackling between us.

Zayn scoffs under his breath. "Figures."

He thinks I wasn't even here. How insulting.

Before I can react, Louis appears behind Liam, throwing an arm over his shoulder with a lazy smirk. "Morning, lovebirds," he teases, obviously not reading the room.

"Fuck off, Lou," Zayn mutters, already stepping past me, into the flat.

Louis just grins, nudging my shoulder. "Here to see me?"

"No," I reply flatly. "Liam, actually."

Louis raises a brow, clearly intrigued, but doesn't push. He grabs his keys off the counter and slaps Zayn's back. "Come on, mate, we're late for the studio."

Zayn exhales sharply, finally looking at me again, just for a second, before turning away.

"Enjoy your morning," he says, and then he's gone.

I let out a slow breath, feeling Liam's eyes on me.

"You gonna tell me what that was about?" he asks, crossing his arms.

I sigh, crossing the room to turn on the kettle and make us two cups of tea. Liam pats the seat next to him on the couch, and I lean into him; breathing in his comforting scent. I sip the freshly brewed tea, burning my lip slightly before sucking in air to try and cool it.

"So, what happened, Rain?" Liam prods, "the last I saw, you two were getting cozy in your new place after your Independence Day party, and now you both look like shit, have hardly a kind word to say to one another, and you show up unnanounced on my doorstep, looking and - " he pauses, "smelling like you haven't showered since the party."

"I fucked up, Li..." I start;

He scoffs, "well no shit Sherlock." I'm not sure if he's trying to make me laugh or if it's just naturally who he is, but his comedic timing makes me chuckle for the first time in two days.