House of Memories

Chapter 1: The Night Everything Was Lost

I can still remember when Suiko smelt exciting. I still get a whiff of that aroma now and then in the places where I shouldn't. Camellias in the courtyard, old wooden pillars on the porch and Mother's medication were all scents I held close to heart. My biggest wish back then was to grow up, to be my mother's age.

Seeing things in hindsight only brought confusion.

Why was I anticipating adulthood so much?

My mother had the title Lady but I had it too. Father gifted her jewellery but he would also bring me gifts. Tailors would come to take measurements for her new clothes but they did so with mine as well. It's not like Mother wore much except her nightgown during that time.

Trying to put myself in the head of my childhood self never goes well.

I was so infatuated with the idea of becoming a wife and a mother that I would constantly bother her to tell me everything about marriage and parenthood. The beads of sweat on her forehead and her voice descending into a faint whisper should've been obvious signs that she was growing tired but I was too consumed by my childhood ignorance to notice my mother's deteriorating condition. I would stop only when Mother's doctors came in.

Her constant fatigue wasn't something to be envious of... quite the contrary. Despite that, she always found the strength to tell me stories, do embroidery work and write.

Not being aware of the height of the hill my mother was climbing I continued expecting stories, continued expecting her to play with me like she did when I was younger and Mother was far more mobile and would get terribly upset when the doctor told me mother had to rest.

Summertime brought me a promise Mother would get better, it was supposed to restore everything winter took from me. Yet she spent days upon days locked behind the doors of her chambers.

Father carried some concealed ire towards Mother ever since he had been told she couldn't bear more children. He wanted an heir, someone he could show off to other lords, generals and other officials of high rank. When General Joon-Gi's daughter was born Father took it upon himself to give condolences. He was met with sharp criticism of his views so he came home with his tail between his legs. Now that I think about it, maybe that was the moment the resentment towards me took root too.

Many didn't believe Father looked down on Mother and me. How could a man whose wife and daughter could have even the milk of birds if they asked it of him possibly be cruel? Everyone thought we were a picture-perfect family, yet only Mother's servants knew what was going on behind closed doors.

Adultery was something my father thought of as an act worthy of stoning to death.

„He is the one to say something is worth stoning for... If he is truly as sinless as he claims to be he should be the one to throw the first stone", I remember hearing servants whispering.

Mother never uttered a single bad word about Father. Even in this state of mind, I believe she was never afraid of him, she stayed silent because her upbringing enforced the idea that she chose him as the father of her child therefore she must accept all of him.

I wish I could've read her memoirs... I wish they hadn't gone up in flames the night I lost everything. The part of me that laments over the loss of childhood innocence is not nearly as big as the part of me that grieves for the loss of my mother's life.

I finished my first embroidery work that night. Dark circles under Mother's eyes became more prominent, her fingers were bony and cold like the hands of death.

Some commotion was made in front of Mother's door before Father burst through it. I will never forget the flicker of fear that ignited in my mother's eyes. This wasn't the first time he would come to start an argument with her but it was the first time I was present.

"Kyung! It's time for Ada's bedtime bath!", Mother said as loudly as she could.

"Yes, my Lady. Lady Ada, come!", Kyung, Mother's servant, appeared at the door.

Father closed the door without a word.

Mother closed her eyes and bowed her head, ready to hear Father's verdict. She already knew she would be found guilty of whatever foolish thing his mind had conjured up this time.

"How many?", he said in a calm tone.

Mother stayed silent.

"How many of them did you have?"

I was looking at him curiously now, wondering if Mother had perhaps eaten too many sweets. Father's calm demeanour was his signature. He never raised his voice, his facial expression would stay the same but his words would cut like a knife.

"I know you thought you wouldn't be caught just because you can't bear more children... I will ask you this only once, Yong-Mi... am I raising a bastard?", his eyes grew cold.

"Ada is your child and I haven't laid my eyes on another man", Mother spoke solemnly.

"How can you lie to me so shamelessly?", he made a few steps toward Mother's bed.

"I am not lying, Sei-Hoon"

"Yes, you are. The guards saw various men come into your chambers"

"They are doctors from The Kai Empire... they brought medication"

"Why couldn't Sui-Mei bring you medication?"

"Sui-Mei is currently at the royal palace in Kuuto. She is much needed there at the moment"

"Yong-Mi... Not only are you lying about your infidelity, but you're also lying about this brat as well"

Everything happened in a blink of an eye.

Mother took me into her arms and covered my eyes with her sleeves. She didn't let out a single sound. Her spirit couldn't be wounded with a simple blade.

Death came in the form of my father that night, taking my mother's life with him.

When Mother's grasp became loose and her arms went limp I wondered if she had fainted again. But when I saw crimson-stained sheets, Mother lying there like a marionette whose strings were cut and Father towering over me with a bloody weapon in his hand, I felt mortal for the first time in my life.

"Lord Sei-Hoon! She is just a child! Spare her life, please!", two guards emerged from the darkness and took Father by the arms. Father didn't try to free himself, he didn't even flinch but his glare burned something into my brain that night... a message never to be forgotten.

Kyung ran to me, took me in her arms and fled the scene.

The story that went out of the mansion was that Mother succumbed to her illness. Father arranged the funeral. Mother's things were either burned or thrown away, her memoirs destroyed.

That night my father didn't just take away my mother... he took away my freedom as well. 

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I have no clue how to use this site so please bear with me.
If you liked the first chapter of this story it would mean the world to me if you told me what you think in the comments.

Is criticism welcome? Yes and thank you in advance.
Just commentary? Yesssss.
Saying one word because you're a person of few words? Wonderful.
Feel free to type out everything, I will read it.

See you tomorrow (Monday) in chapter 2!

xoxo Cammie

I DO NOT own Akatuski no Yona, the characters I do own are my original characters Ada, Lady Yong-Mi, Lord Sei-Hoon and Kyung (chapter 1).