The Art of Being a Gentleman

CHAPTER ONE

Gymnophobia is the fear of being seen naked.

Though this would most often be thought of as physical nudity, there are some situations that can make you feel emotionally naked. Some examples may include: public speaking, giving someone a gift you're not sure that they'll like, or trying to flirt with the girl you've had a crush on since junior year that is so far out of your league that it's almost ridiculous, and you've failed before but you really like her and are going to try again.

Oh, in case you didn't figure it out by the oddly specific example, we're definitely talking about David Potosky and his enormous crush on Alyssa Harvard.

Comparable to the University of the same name, Alyssa Harvard was considered by many to be the definition of excellence amongst her peers.

Not only was she easily the most attractive girl at William Shore High School, but she was in the top of her class, president of the environmental club, and an all-around ten out of ten.

She was perfect.

And despite all the previous rejections he had endured, David was still set on scoring a date with her.

Somehow.

Taking a deep breath, he approached Alyssa at her locker. His long, confident strides forced the other students in the hall to make room for him.

All he could see was her dark hair that fell in loose waves to her shoulder blades as she dug through her bag, but he knew that the moment she turned around, he would be totally lost in the bluest eyes he had ever seen, and blinded by the greatest smile.

"Excuse me," he said as he leaned casually against the locker next to hers.

Alyssa's head turned towards him and her perfectly shaped eyebrows raised as she took him in, "Yeah?"

He was distracted for a moment with his thoughts on how cute she looked in her flowing skirt and a cardigan, a classic Alyssa Harvard look, but he quickly shook himself and asked, "You're in the environmental club, right? I was wondering if I could ask you a few things."

Her blue eyes lit up with curiosity, and David noted that the couple girls that had been hovering nearby immediately lost interest and pulled away from them.

"Oh, sure. What kind of things do you need to know?"

"Well, you see," David said, trying to properly recite the lines his friend had coached him on. "I'm doing a report on Global Warming, and as the main subject, I need to do an interview."

"Main subject? Why would I be the main subject?"

"Because I have a theory that you're causing it. You know, because... you're so... hot."

As he spoke, the transition on her face from a pleasant smile to an unimpressed frown threw David off.  Instead of being completely flattered and falling into his waiting arms so that they could run off into the sunset as he had expected, Alyssa frowned and shut her locker with force.

"Sorry, I have to go," she said slowly, a hint of annoyance coming through. She turned on her heel and quickly escaped down the hallway, not even looking back once.

David was disappointed, but not entirely shocked. "I'm gonna take that as a 'no' then."

In hindsight, maybe the pickup line wasn't such a good idea.

Having come from Mack's brain in the first place should've been enough to tell David that it was, in fact, a horrible idea. But that wasn't the first time he had gone along with one of Mack's stupid plans, (may we all remember the firework disaster of 2008) and it definitely wouldn't be the last.