Chapter Twenty Five - Fears

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Chapter Twenty Five – Fears

The strange thing about rumours is that people never ask the people involved. They ask the ones spreading the rumours, which was exactly why I still hadn't received any direct questions, just weird glances and occasional whispers in the hallway.

I hadn't spoken to any of the guys in days, except for Dean, when he was around Ella. That guy was spending an increasing amount of time with Ella, which was personally a little concerning. That sly smirk and seemingly innocent smile had broken many hearts, and I wasn't keen on having my best friend's heart run over any time soon.

All the year twelves were ushered into the auditorium on the cold Wednesday morning. Ella and I sprinted through the pitter-pattering rain, arriving just on time. The seats were packed and we scanned the rows for two empty seats next to each other.

A hand waved from the crowd. It was Dean. Ella waved back and led me through to the second last row from the back. There were two empty seats next to him and Ella and I sat down. He wasn't sitting with Hunter and the others, but his other friends – Adam, Michael, Wesley and a few others.

At the beginning of the year, I would've grouped them all as the jock no-gooders, but having been around the badboys for a while, I stayed open minded – no judging until they actually insulted me.

"Had to kick out two randoms for the two seats," Dean said to Ella.

"Impressive manners," she replied sarcastically, obviously still giddy about it nonetheless.

Principal Ryan cleared his throat and tapped the microphone a few times with a screech of feedback before silence returned. "As you all know, year twelve is a very important year in all of your lives. Whether you intend on going to university, or if you intend on picking up a trade, you need to spend your time wisely."

His booming voice echoed in my mind. This was it. This was the final year. This was the end point of over eleven years of education. This one year would decide my future. And it was making me sick.

I looked at the rows of heads in front of me. What did all these people want to do? Where would they be in five years' time? Where would I be in five years' time? I'd been worrying so much about my reputation for the past week that I'd forgotten that the next round of exams was coming up.

I spotted Ace, Hunter and Dylan a few rows in front. Hunter had his head tilted to the side, his shoulders slumped – was he sleeping? Ace sat upright, rigid. Dylan seemed more interested in fiddling with his arm rest than anything else.

Where would they be in five years?

I could never forget the way Ace's brown eyes shimmered behind the rim of his glasses that night – the night I'd been stranded in the shed with Hunter for a few hours. Ace studied, sometimes, I was pretty sure; he had potential, and there it all was, going to waste.

"This year, you need to give it your all, so that you have no regrets. So that in a few years' time, you can look back, and be proud because you did your best. Whether you reached your goals or not, you'll know that you did everything in your power to try and attain that goal. So don't let laziness, parties and fleeting fun ruin your chance," Principal Ryan continued.

I'd heard these speeches too many times. Each and every time, I would think about how I was going about with my life – my lack of motivation and my lack of drive. Nothing would change. I wanted to be driven, but it just wasn't happening.

"On the way out, feel free to grab any university brochures and course booklets. There are also some employment agencies and things like that available." Principal Ryan was about to dismiss us all when he remembered something. "Also, the universities have many scholarships on offer, so have a read and apply. You never know, you could end up saving thousands of dollars; you could get a free university education."

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