Much Like Falling

Chapter Nineteen

*Mia's P.O.V*

“Are you serious? Are you fucking kidding me?”

I watched, frightened, as my boyfriend paced my room. His black attire stood out from my purple and white room, and I couldn’t help but think how cute he looked frustrated; cute, but also scary.

I wanted to tell him sooner. Believe me, I did. I just didn’t know how to. According to Melody, I should’ve kept pushing him away. I shouldn’t have told him that I liked him. But after speaking to Mum, she told me I should go for it, that there was a reason our paths crossed, and now we should make the most of it.

I just couldn’t stay away. Selfishly, I loved him too much to let him go.

He turned to face me, his voice quiet and shaky, as if he were to cry, “Since when?”

I wiped my tears away and bravely let my hands fall back into my lap. I felt weird having my hair out of my face, but every little touch seemed to irritate me today. “I was diagnosed in 2011.” It was nearly exactly two years since I had been diagnosed with cancer, and several months since I had been told my cancer was terminal.

As if Emerson could look any worse, his face dropped. He quickly wiped his eyes with the sleeve of his black hoodie, turning away from me.

“Why didn’t you tell me sooner?” I barely heard him. “How-how bad is it?”

“Th-they can’t do anything for me…” I choked. I still hadn’t fully accepted the fact that this disease was killing me. We had tried everything, but nothing could cure me of such disgust. When I was told there was nothing they could do for me, the thought of waiting to die pained me. Kids at school were treating me like crap, and I was so behind in school. Everything just seemed to pile up and… I don’t know… I guess I just wanted it all to end. I ended up at that lookout, wanting to kill myself. But then Emerson showed himself. He looked so cute, being vulnerable and all…

He saved me.

A loud thumping noise brought me back to reality.

“Fuck!”

I saw the dent in my wall and instantly realised Emerson had punched it. I was frightened. He was turning violent and I felt threatened. Would he hurt me?

Our eyes met briefly, “How long do you have?” he asked.

“What?”

“How long do you have to live, Mia?”

I shrugged as I had to fight to keep my tears inside.

“Fuck sake… I can’t do this…” I watched as he stormed out of my room. I listened to his shoes pounding against the stairs, and it wasn’t until the front door slammed shut that I let my tears flow.

And I couldn’t stop.

What did he mean he couldn’t do it? Was he breaking up with me?

I texted him,

I thought you weren’t going to break up with me…