Still, Will and Always

Chapter 20 : A confession

After successfully executing my plan, I wasted no time and hurried to Gavvy's house, my heart pounding with a mix of anticipation and worry. On my way to his house, I stumbled across a bakery and saw bread. I went inside the store and I bought sliced bread and santan (coconut jam with pili nuts). As I continued to walk, my heart started to feel something weird like it was telling me to prepare for something. As I approached the front door of his house, I knocked eagerly, hoping to see Gavvy and take care of him.

As expected, Gavvy opened the door but with a disappointed look on his face. He told me “ I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU NOT TO COME!! I DON'T WANT YOU TO SKIP SCHOOL.” His disappointment and madness was evident in his expression. He tried to dismiss me, urging me to go back to school and not worry about him. But I couldn't just let him shut me out so easily. Determined, I pushed against the door, forcing it open to continue my mission of caring for him.

Seeing my persistence, Gavvy's expression softened, but he still seemed hesitant. He was torn between his desire for my company and his concern for my education. Just as he was about to shut the door, I mustered up all my strength and pushed the door open, determined to be there for him.

He stumbled backward, caught off guard by my forceful entry. He collapsed onto the floor, exhausted and overwhelmed by his emotions. Without hesitation, I rushed to his side, catching him before he hit the ground. With gentle care, I lifted him in my arms and carried him to his bed, laying him down gently. Then I grabbed warm water and soaked a small towel, then I rubbed it on him. While doing it, I saw bruises on his body. Seeing the bruises made me even more worried about him.

Later Gavvy slowly regained his consciousness, he found himself in the comforting presence of mine. My concern and determination to take care of him were evident. I looked into his eyes, I could feel his mix of gratitude and vulnerability, realizing how much I cared for him.

In his weakened state, Gavvy struggled to find the words to express his conflicting emotions. He looked into my eyes, silently conveying his appreciation for being there. I reassured him with a gentle smile, letting him know that I was there for him.

As Gavvy began to regain his strength, I turned my attention to the task at hand. I asked Gavvy where the medicine cabinet was, wanting to provide him with the necessary care. He weakly pointed in the direction, his trust in me growing with each passing moment.

With a sense of purpose, I made my way to the medicine cabinet. Opening it, I was taken aback by the sight of numerous bottles and boxes of medicine. It became clear to me that Gavvy had been dealing with health issues that I hadn't fully understood before. I felt a surge of empathy and determination to support him through whatever challenges he faced.

Returning to Gavvy's side with the required medications, I couldn't contain my curiosity any longer. I mustered the courage to ask the question that had been weighing on my mind since the previous night.
"Why did you kiss me last night?" I asked, feeling a mix of confusion, longing, and a genuine need for answers. Gavvy hesitated for a moment, his face showing a range of emotions, before finally responding, "...umm... Actually, I'm gay. I knew you had feelings for me, and I like you too, Van."

His confession caught me off guard, and I couldn't help but feel a bit frustrated. I blurted out, "You... Then why didn't you tell me earlier? We could've been dating by now." My disappointment and longing were evident in my voice.

Gavvy's expression softened, and he replied, "Van, there's something else... I'm sick, so I can't be with you." His words hit me like a punch in the gut. I quickly retorted, "It's just a fever. You'll get better soon."

But Gavvy's response was serious and somber. "No, Van, it's more than just a fever. I have leukemia. The doctor said I only have 5 to 20 years to live, and I've already made it to 12 years." His voice trembled with a mix of vulnerability and acceptance.

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. It felt like a bad joke. I blurted out, "Are you kidding? That's not funny."

Gavvy's eyes filled with sadness, and he shook his head. "No, Van, I'm not kidding. I wish I were. But it's the reality I'm facing."

My heart sank as the weight of Gavvy's condition sank in. It was a harsh reality to accept. I realized that our relationship would be far from ordinary, and the time we had together would be limited. Emotions swirled within me - love, fear, and a deep desire to make the most of the time we had left.

"No, I'm not kidding. Actually, 12 years ago, I met my first love in the hospital. I was scared and didn't want to be alone, so luckily, I had a roommate. We became friends, maybe even best friends. He would sing me songs until we both fell asleep. But one day, he disappeared. I asked my mom, and she told me he was discharged. I waited for days, hoping he would come to visit, but he never did. In those final days, I had another roommate with the same condition as me, but sadly, he passed away. I was terrified, and I told my mom about my fears and trauma. It got to the point where she had no choice but to discharge me from the hospital. I changed schools every year, hoping to find my best friend again. And one day, I saw him on the school's track field. It was a Friday afternoon, and the sky was painted pink. I found him there, his shoes about to fall apart."

I replied, amazed by Gavvy's journey, "Wow, you've been through so much just to see your first love again." Gavvy took a deep breath and continued, "Van, listen to me. When I saw him again, I promised myself that I would never do anything to hurt you..."

(To be continued…)

*Note 21 is probably the last chapter, or 30. After that I will redo the whole story with the same character, different but a similar plot.

Clint - end of beginning