GUARD DOWN | Hayes Campbell

06.

DAY TWO OF COACHELLA... Eden and I agreed today would be more chilled, yesterday we did so much walking I think I was doing it whilst sleeping. Our version of chilled includes eating and drinking anything in our eyeline. For the first time in so long Eden and I are getting ready and there is no shitty boyband music playing? Maybe she just needed to get it all out of her system.

Eden hands me the cutest outfit ever. 'This is for you M'Lady' she curtsies as she hands it over, 'Why thank you sir' I bop her nose and go into the bathroom to change. I added finishing touches to my makeup and we are ready to face Coachella Day 2.

'I am so glad you came with me Cece' Eden says while we hand in hand walking into the festival, I am glad I came too but don't want to let her be too much of a smart aleck. 'Good' I kiss her forehead and we gallop our way in. It is so fucking hot. I'm going to look just like a tomato at the end of today.

After we have our first drink and attempt to cool off, we watch Sabrina Carpenter's set and dance to our fullest.

FOUR HOURS LATER...

Fourteen drinks down and I don't feel a thing, I wonder how much they water these things down and then sell them for extreme prices. 'I have an idea' Eden utters almost incoherently whilst giggling, 'Annnd whats that' I respond whilst swirling my drink around with my straw.

'There are a plethora of absolute sex gods here, why don't we try and pull ourselves some' Eden giggles even more and winks at the barman. 'I don't know Eden, I don't think I'm ready. But if you need a wing woman, I am your girl' She pouts.

I probably am ready, I hate that jerk. I am not still hung up on him at all, and would rather die than even be within a mile of him. I don't know, I think I've developed an irrational fear that all I am good for is sex and then they just fall out of love or dispose of me. That explains why I am just an all-round good-looking man-hater, I assume the worst because the worst is what I always get.

'Okay, maybe I will find one near the stage. Doja Cat is on soon, let's down a few drinks and slay the motherfucking night away' Eden persuades and we clink our drinks together and start to chug our drinks.

'I WANNNA SHOW YOU OFFFF, I WANNA SHOW YOU OFFF' Eden and I belt out quite inaudible as Doja performs. Eden is pressed up against a gorgeous man having the time of her life, I am just drunkenly embarrassing myself. I think all the drinks have finally hit me, maybe chugging the drinks was not a fine idea. I can see Eden looking out of her mind, but at least I am here with her, I may not be sober but I can still see her - which is a good thing.

1 HOUR LATER ..

Coachella is about to finish for the day and Eden and I are absolutely steaming, although she is way worse than I am. The guy she was with is no longer with us but wrote his phone number up her arm but it's all been smudged by her sweat.

We are stumbling and laughing towards the cab's that will take us to the hotel although we have had to pick ourselves off the floor about ten times now. The cab driver rolls his window down and say's the worst thing we could hear right now 'You ladies are too drunk to ride in the cabs, please find an alternate way home. You can walk but it will take you about an hour just to get out of here right now' He gives a sorry look and rolls his window back up.

Great. Fucking Great. Why are we getting punished for having a good time?. I look over to Eden and she is slumped into a bush passed out, I quickly take a picture of her then help her up and sit beside her. 'Mmm Cece I need my bed' She whines as her head is rocking back and forth.

Think drunk Cece, THINK. I could just tell Eden it's a 10-minute walk and see how far she goes, or hopefully, a coach shows up, or a rich man who will take us in his helicopter.

That's when it finally clicks, I have Hayes's number on my phone. I don't even know if he is still here he could be back to wherever he came from. It's worth a shot, sober me will regret this.

Hayes

Me: Any chance you're still at Coachella or in the area?

Hayes: Who's this?

Me: You wrote your number on my signed

poster of your shitty band.

Hayes: Hi Cecilia. Had a feeling you'd text.

Me: Shut up. Can you answer my questimnko ?!

Hayes: Ha, are you drunk? Yes, I am staying at a hotel nearby. Why? Miss me?

Me: nO way. look. eden is passed out rn and

the cab's wont let us ride.

is there anyway u can dispatch one of ur a million drivers to

take us to our hotel ?

Hayes: I can come pick you up myself, I am not that shallow.

Is it busy in the area? Where about's are you?

Me: Cool, at least you're useful for something. no.

the area has pretty been cleared bc some people

arent fun and ddnt get drunk.

We're near wristband area.

Hayes: Okay, I'll be there in about 20 minutes. Oh and Cece?

Me: What?

Hayes: Say Please.

Me: You're infuriating.

Hayes: Say Please or 'August Moon is the best band ever'

Me: Please.

Hayes: Omw.

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