God Of Languish

𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐎𝐧𝐞 ♡

Alicia 

I sit up straight in bed, nausea weaves its way into my stomach,  my chest heaves.  Mum's words play in my mind.  Breathe in,  breathe out,  breathe in,  breathe out.   I  clutch my shaking hands to my chest,  tears involuntarily roll down my cheeks and I have to wipe my eyes to be able to see clearly. 

I grip the stuffed bear to my chest,   the last thing Mum thought she'd leave me with.  

She's still here.  We're both here.  We're both okay.  My racing heart beat finally settles but my mind does not. It's no use trying to fall back asleep.  I glance at the clock standing on my night stand. 

Bloody hell. 

It's four in the morning. 

I slip out of bed,  the warm texture of my slippers are a welcome contrast to my suddenly ice cold sheets.  I walk over to my vanity and my eyes dip to my poetry notebook that I left sitting open instead of putting away. 

"You can see it all,

just look in her eyes." 

I swallow the tight knot that managed to build its way into my throat.  I slam the cover to the notebook and pull the drawer open,  slipping it inside.  Unfortunately,  my own words are things I hide from most often.  It's what's most... real.

I walk out of my bedroom and find myself in the kitchen,  I open the cabinet and grab a glass before walking to the water faucet. 

"What are you doing awake?" 

I jump, dropping my glass to the floor,  tiny glass shards scatter across the floor and I spin around to meet Creighton's gaze.  "Sorry."  We both say in sync. 

The corners of his lips twitch up and he walks to grab the broom while I grab the dust pan and we simultaneously work to clean up the pieces in silence.  That's one good thing about my brother,  he never presses matters. 

"So what are you doing up so early?"  He asks again. 

I shrug and look anywhere but at him.  "I could technically ask you the same question." 

He casts me an unamused look and I just look down at my hands,  rubbing away the prick of blood that stemmed from a piece of glass.  "I just had a nightmare and couldn't go back to sleep."  Not that I tried. 

"Again?" 

I nod. 

"How many times is that this week?" 

"Three." I force out,  silently praying that his face won't etched with pity  when I look up at him,   like it usually is with everyone.

"Alicia-" 

I look back up at him and shake my head.  "No,  I know.  I'm working on it,  it'll get better eventually." 

He frowns,  Creigh has partially mellowed out luckily,  due to Annika.  He's not so silent anymore,  it's like we all got a part of him back that we didn't even realize there was in the first place.  Of course things happened,  the incident for one,  but it all worked out. 

He sighs when he realizes this conversation is getting nowhere and retreats back to his side of the house where his room lies. 

The sun comes up eventually,  long after when I woke.  I set down Dead Poets Society,  which happens to be my favorite book ever,  when Mum walks into the living room with a cheerful smile that says she has no idea what happened this morning.  Thank God it was Creigh who was there instead of Eli. 

She is followed closely by Dad who has his usual look of adoration on his face whenever he's looking at Mum,  something I'm hoping that someday I'll experience too. 

Dad presses his usual kiss to my forehead and mumbles,  "Morning, miracle."  He's called me that as long as I can remember. 

"Good morning, Alie."  Mum grins and hugs me so tightly I can barely breathe.  "Are you ready for  today?"  Absolutely not. 

I force a smile back. "Yeah!" 

Dad eyes me suspiciously but doesn't say anything about it.  "Are you driving with your cousins or are you taking the jet?"  He and Grandpa assured me plentifully that I could take the jet if I chose but I couldn't think of a better way of getting to uni without Glyn and Bran. 

"Driving- which they'll be here soon. I've got to get going."  I grab my book and shove it into my tote bag,  I give Mum another quick hug followed by Dad.  

"Good luck, sweetheart!"  Mum chimes at the same time Dad says, "no boys." 

Mum rolls her eyes and jabs Dad in the ribs playfully,  offering me a wink. 

ᥫ᭡

Royal Elite University is really nothing like any other university I applied to,  of course this was my number one choice all things considered but I figured it would've been better to keep my options open. 

I glance at my phone,  a text from Ariella lights it up. 

Ari: Got here early, we've got a pretty nice flat for freshmen. Thank god for rich parents!! 

I laugh and type back in response, 

Alie: Don't you dare bring Remi there before I see it. 

Ari: I have no idea what you're talking about. :) 

I snort and Bran glances at me,  I look up at him. "Oh, Ari is there already,  I just told her not to bring Remi over yet." 

"I don't think his spawn would allow that."  He laughs and I smile.  Unlike his twin,  who has personality of his own sort,  Bran is singlehandedly the sweetest person I've ever met. 

I look around. "This is a lot to take in." 

"You'll get used to it." Glyn pipes in and squeezes my hand. "Oh god.." 

I look up to see where her words are directed when my breath quite literally hitches.  Ceases to continue.  

Dark brown hair that I can't help but wonder what it would feel like to run my hands through- Alicia, absolutely not. I don't know much about the Heathens,  but what I do know is what Landon told me.  Trouble.  That was after he found out that Killian and Glyn were a thing,  but... I should definitely stop making excuses for what's going on in my mind.  Because it's a problem. 

And unfortunately the problem comes with a name,  Vaughn Morozov.