Now Set me free

Marceline.

//okay new story bc I hated it's how I feel and I deleted ts if y'all want me to put it back up I will but idk I felt like it was repetitive//

//not doing a character list bc I need to work on actually writing and describing the characters instead of using pictures//

TW- Self harm, eating disorders (anorexia) religious trauma and pedophilia

"Marceline!" My mother yells, "come on!"

"Yes ma'am" I say and roll my eyes.

I notice my shirt has rolled down a little.

I fix my shirt to somehow cover more than it is.

I hate feeling shame for everything little thing.

But it's okay, God wouldn't want me showing this much.

A girl, about my age, walks by me and my mother.

She is wearing a low cut shirt and shorts.

My mother rolls her eyes and scoffs at the girl.

She covers herself with her cardigan.

"I'm gonna go to the bathroom." I say and walk away from my mother and her shopping cart.

I walk through the grocery store aisles until I see the small figures of a stick man and one in a dress.

I walk into the woman's bathroom and go into one of the stalls.

For a while, I play on my phone, wanting to be alone.

I realize I should go, I've been in here for a while.

Once I get back to my mother, she's ready to go.

She pays as I wait, with my hands folded at my hips.

I stare at the posters and colorful fruits, around the store.

I wonder what it would be like if I was someone different.

Or if I thought other things.

-

"Ms. Isa!" I yell, jumping up and hugging her.

She's my life leader, at church.

She helps me learn about god and all that.

"Hi, marce." She says, she looks me up and down.

She looks annoyed.

I raise an eyebrow, "what's wrong?"

"Your outfit is..." she looks disgusted.

I look down and fix any imperfections on my skirt.

Fixing my belle sleeve top, I inquire, "what's wrong with it?"

"Your makeup too." She scoffs.

I pull out my mirror, I keep in my purse.

Looking into the glass, I don't see what's wrong.

"Isa?" I ask, I can't find the conflict.

"It's just, uhmm..." she puts hand over her face, disappointed. "Those colors."

"What?"

My outfit is black and brown, my makeup is just a small back wing of eyeliner.

My clothes cover everything?

The colors?

What about them?

"Huh? Isa what are you talking about?" I start to feel insecure, I want to cry.

She sighs, "Marceline, the colors on your outfit and the eyeliner you have on, is sinful. You know what? Just go home, I won't let you in the sermon room wearing that!"

What?

I'm being kicked out of a church? For wearing black and brown?

I thought Christians were supposed to love everyone.

No matter what.

"Love thou neighbor"

I sit in my car, I can feel the tears welling.

I'm just 16, I can't even dress how I want.

I don't even want to go to church anymore.

The people there aren't loving.

They just judge and judge and criticize, because they think they have the right.

"It's in gods will!"

No it's not.

Hate isn't in the Bible.

Discrimination isn't in the Bible.

God, if he's even up there, doesn't want hate.

Christians just demonize everyone and use the Bible as an excuse.

There's so many loopholes in that stupid fucking scroll.

I can't even be happy without people saying it's a sin.

Well, fuck them and their sins..

I'm me.

I'm going to do what I want.

It's not sinning.

I open the door and walk back inside.

"I thought I told you, go home and change!" Isa yells, i ignore her, I don't care.

I walk past her and sit down on one of the chairs in the sermon room.

"Hi pastor!" I say, waving.

"Hi, marceline! How are you?" He says, waving back.

"I'm great, how are you?"

"Amazing."

"Good to hear."

He walks away, I smirk at isa.

My soul giggles, I'm happy with myself.

I finally stood up for whats right.

-

Isa doesn't say anything to me at life groups.

The preppy girls give me weird looks, but I don't care.

Because I'm not them, I'm me.

Marceline.

//FINALLY IM UPLOADING I haven't been on here in so long I'm so sorry but a tree did crush my house so🤩🤩//