The reality of a average person

The teen [part 2]

-bad grammar
     

                                      The teen
As a child I thought hmm if become a teen everything would get solved and after I became a teen I slowly realized that the fact is I never had problems to solve from the beginning that I had a victim mentality and I realized I just didn't know how to act with people and I was just dumb and stupid and I was just a attention seeker who was making problems so I could fit in and the ego that was bigger than my burden. As my days goes as I meet people, leave people and as I get left I realized it only takes seconds, minutes , hours ,days and years to make that two soul mates into strangers again it only takes a certain time to make a two people into strangers. After that realization came I wasn't interested in love I just said to myself even if i loved a person to love a person you needed to understand them and I never actually understood people not even myself or my family I was only putting up a fake personality so I don't get sent to the mental hospital for being weird as people put it I find it interesting that people but mentally unwell people into a place that would make them worse and I find it more interesting that they talk about what's right or wrong who actually knows what's right or wrong and even morals, and the thing I realized most is I hate people and by hating people you need to hate yourself and I tried harming myself but I didn't wanted to hurt myself I just wanted to bc I thought it would make me look all sad and people would take pity in me that's what I exactly wanted attention I loved attention and I was a freak of a teenager but it died down slowly but surely the only thing I take pleasure from was gone now I hated people looking down on me  [part 2 half 1 ] (i really don't have motivation to continue this)