Ice Cold

48

"You didn't do anything stupid," Wren said after a few moments.

I almost snapped at him then to ask him why he was acting the way he was if I supposedly didn't do anything, but I stopped myself. The thought of me acting crazy, seeing things that weren't there passed through my mind. Maybe Wren wasn't acting strange. Maybe I was just being paranoid.

"Okay..." I said, unsure of what to do next. "I guess I'll see you later then."

"Sure."

I didn't know whether to go over and kiss him, and he didn't give me any indication of what I should do. He didn't make a move for me, so I just turned toward the door feeling hollow.

This whole morning confused me. Nothing had happened. We didn't fight, neither of us were being mean, but there was just something that made me feel like I had been dumped. Something about his demeanor made me think I had just been kicked out even though I hadn't. My eyes were stinging, but I quickly pulled myself together. Nothing had happened. We were fine. There was nothing to be upset about.

I met up with Jess for breakfast and told her about my morning.

"You're sure I didn't do anything stupid?" I asked her.

Jess sat across from me with a steaming cup of coffee in her hand and a soft expression on her face. She listened to me intently, nodding along to my concerns and assuring me I wasn't being crazy.

"You didn't," she told me. "Not that I saw. You two were having a good time. You were all over each other! He seemed happy when he brought you home."

"So it was something I did after that," I said, sighing before taking a bite of my food.

"Or something he did," Jess retorted with raised eyebrows.

"What could he possibly have done to make him act like that? I don't even remember anything," I replied. "Wren doesn't get embarrassed. And he doesn't do anything he doesn't want to."

"Maybe he was just tired?" she suggested. "Maybe he was up taking care of you."

"I guess," I muttered. "But if he's tired, why go for a run this morning?"

"I don't know," she said. "Maybe you're overthinking this. He could just be having an off day. Why don't you just give him the day to himself and talk to him after hockey practice tonight?"

"I just can't help but feel like something is going to blow up in my face," I said, pushing my plate toward the center of the table and putting my face in my hands.

"Landon," Jess said, taking one of my hands in hers and pulling it from my face. I looked over at her, Jess smiling softly at me. "I think you're underestimating the connection you and Wren have. Whatever it is, you two will be fine. You two care about each other too much to let something come between you."

"I love him," I admitted and Jess's smile got wider.

"Have you told him that?"

"No, I can't," I quickly replied.

She narrowed her eyes. "Why not?"

"I just..."

It was hard to explain and it probably wouldn't make sense to her even if I did.

"I just can't." I let go of her hand.

Jess shot a me a knowing look, taking another sip of her coffee.

"It's ok to be scared," she said.

I narrowed my eyes at her. "And you've told Stella you love her, right?"