𝐅𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐚𝐭 𝐠𝐮𝐧 𝐩𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐭, 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐚𝐭 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭.

a 'little' talk

This chapter has mentions of !SA! There will be a warning before it happens <3

Lapis pov:

"I know.."  I back out of the hug and look down at her, she's looking at the ground, refusing to make eye contact with me.

"What do you mean?"   There's alot she could now know. And alot of it would make mine and hers friendship..awkward.?

"I don't think it's best to talk about it..here."  she sounded unsure. I'm now feeling anxious that she could literally know anything about me I didn't want her to know.

"Uh..let's go to my room?"

All she did was nod and start to walk over to the elevator. I followed after her and while we slowly go up all the things she could know is starting to play around in my head.

Could she know about the 19 criminal charges? People ive killed? The number of people I've killed? There's so many things going through my head it hurts to think of something else.

"Uh lapis? The doors are open.." 

OH SHIT

"Oops! I uh wasn't paying attention, sorry!" I quickly step out before the crusty doors could shut on me.

We walk down the hallway and make it to my room, I unlock it, letting her step inside first then walk in and shut it myself.

I sat down at my desk and she sat in the chair in front of me.

"SO um. What do you apparently 'know' "  I rest my face on my hands as I watch her expression change a few times.

"Uh..about you and jasper."

Oh shit, she really does know some shit. Wait. Not all right?

"I pretty much told you though?" She's probably going to think I'm dumb as shit but I'm just trying to long this out as much as I can.

"No I mean. The full story..well not all of it, bismuth didn't tell me a part of it.."

...bismuth..? That isn't her fucking story to tell. It isn't even a fucking story.

"That fucking bitch.."  I tried to whisper but failed miserably, as I see peridots face changed into worry.

"Don't do anything bad..she just told me as jasper would apparently lie.."

Well.. I mean she is right that prick would fucking lie. Especially to peri. :((

"What part didn't she tell you?." I'm hopeing it's what I think it is.

"It's was something that happened before you and her broke up for good? She said it wasn't her place to tell me that.."

I wasn't her fucking place to tell you anything in first place.

"If your comfortable..would you ever tell me?"

I know I should talk to someone about it..maybe she's the one to talk about it to? Would she get freaked out tho..I hope not.

WARNING! THIS NEXT PART HAS MENTIONS OF !SA!
IF YOU WANT TO SKIP, SCROLL INTILL YOU FIND THE NEXT BOLD LETTERS!! <3 

"You promise not to freak out?."

"Lapis I promise, your my friend! I'm here for you.." she puts her hand on mine and I slightly feel my face warm up.

"I assume..bismuth told you about the abuse we both did to each other...and the week leading up to the break up..it was worse then ever. Jasper had told me..she wanted to break up. And I know it would've been better if we did. But I begged her to stay. And uh.."

I felt hot tears falling down my face. I couldn't control them like I normally do.

I felt an cold hand wipe them away.

"Thanks.." I take a deep breath In and out, my legs start to shake a bit but I tried to ignore it the best I could, peridot must have noticed as she keeps looking down at my legs then back at my face.

"When I begged her to stay..she uh got really mad..and..she assaulted me.." 

I continue to breathe in and out slowly, I look at peridots face.

She looked like she just saw a ghost. She had a tiny tear in her eye.

And i swear.
I blinked for a second and she hugged me.

"You didn't have to tell me that lapis.. but I just want you to know..I'm not going anywhere,
I'm not going to freak out and run away. Im here for you."

HII! YOU CAN READ FROM HERE NOW! THERE WILL BE NO MORE MENTIONS OF IT !! <3

hearing her words made me cry even more.

This time they was more of happy tears.

It felt good to cry.
Ever since me and jaspers broke up and I killed all those people I didn't cry in front of anyone.
And that means I didn't cry hardly at all.
I always had my pearl with me.

"Thank you peri.."

I hug her back and snuggle into her hair.

I'm glad we got to meet again.

I'm glad I was able to actually cry to someone.
It's hard.
I've been like I am for a year and a half and it was just getting more difficult the more it went on.

I feel like a kid again.

Gay people am I right?

Original characters belong to Rebecca suger

Original idea BagofDoritos