~𝕐𝕠𝕦𝕣 ℂ𝕠𝕝𝕠𝕣~ [SeongJoong]

𝐸𝓁𝑒𝓋𝑒𝓃

[if I die in the next few days it's because I haven't been able to manage two books (+The yungi in my drafts and the woosang that I'm thinking of writing) at the same time yey]

Hongjoong was determined. Maybe a little scared, but determined nonetheless.

He was currently sitting in class, not listening to a word that came out from his proffessor's mouth.

He was too busy running over his plan in his mind.

His mother had suggested for him to pay a visit to Seonghwa's house to check if everything was alright and if Seonghwa was just sick.

Hongjoong had argued that the older's father was homophobic and that he didn't know how he would react to a guy, esxpeccially someone like Hongjoong, looking for his son without any apparent reason. So his mother had came up with a solution.

He would gather all of his notes from the past few days in a notebook and when he went over to Seonghwa's house he would tell his parents that the teacher had asked him to bring them to him.

That would work, Seonghwa's father couldn't possibly argue with a teacher, at least that's what Hongjoong hoped.

Once the bell rung, signaling the end of lessons for that day, he stood up grabbing his already ready backpack, and run out of the room, into the corridor, and out the exit door.

The whole walk to Seonghwa's house he could feel his nerves acting up and he almost passed the other house from the nrvouseness. He fortunately stopped a few steps later, realizing it and turning around to walk up to the door.

He took out the red notebook he had put into his beckpack that morning, the one with the notes, and rung the doorbell, plastering a fake smile on his face even if in that moment smiling was the last thing he wanted to do.

A man opened the door.

"Who are you?" The man asked sternly.

"Hello, I'm one of Seonghwa's classmates, our teacher asked me to bring him some notes since he was absent for the past few days. Are you Seonghwa's father?"

The man glared at him. Hongjoong could feel the judgement in the way the man's eyes scanned his appearence, from his purple hair from his nails and the way he stood. The man's eyes flickered on the notebook for a second before he spoke again and "I don't have a son."

"Who is at the door?" A female's voice reached Hongjoong's ear, it was probably Seonghwa's mother.

"A classmate of your excuse of a son." The man turned back to Hongjoong. "That scumbag is not here and I don't have any idea of where that fucker is, so leave before you regret coming here in the first place."

Hongjoong was dumbfounded. How could someone talk like that about the person they brought to the world, someone who was supposed to bring happiness to their parents lives? He could not understand.

But suddenly he realized why Seonghwa had been so hard on himself when they firstly met, why he seemed so distant, and scared, and why he seemed so sad almost all the time.

He politely bowed to the man and turned around to walk away.

He didn't feel like going home. He felt like crying, because who knew what Seonghwa had to go through in his life? How much he was forced to change because of the man that he always called his father even when he spoke about him like that?

Was that Hongjoong's fault?

Was what happened at the park the reason why Seonghwa had disappeared so suddenly.

Fear and guilt were a dangerous combination to feel at the same time, and he found himself with his knees on the concrete, not knowing when and how his knees had decided to collaps.

His shoulder started shaking, broken sobs started leaving his mouth in what he recognized as a panic attack.

God he hadn't had one in so long he had forgotten how it felt. He remembered having them a lot when he was trying to hide his sexuality from his family, before he came out and his parents had held him in their arms telling him everything was going to be fine and he didn't have to worry.

This time was the same, but different.

The feeling was the same, the tears were streaming down his face the same way, and his breath was leaving him the same, but the reason behind it was different.

Fear of something happening to Seonghwa , fear of losing him, and guilt for he was probably the reason everything happened in the first place.

Yes, Seonghwa seemed happier than when he had first met him, but he seemed more scared, more on edge. Hongjoong should've known better.

He felt arms wrapping around him and a voice in his ear, telling him to try and control his breathing. His hands cluched around the fabric of what felt like the fabric of a shirt as he focused on stopping to hyperventilating. He covered his mouth with one hand to stop himself from paswing out to the excess of oxygen in his system while the person who was hugging him slowly caressed his back in a soothing manner.

He finally calmed down after what seemed like hours and looked up, to find a mid aged woman staring worriedly at him.

"Thank you." He said. His voice cracked, he couldn't help it.

The woman smiled sadly at him.

"You care for Seonghwa, I can see it."

Hongjoong's eyes widened even just slightly as he took the woman's appearence in.

She had slightly wavy hair to her shoulder in a dark brown color. She looked exausted, and probably older than her actual age. Her wrinkles were prominent and the corners of his mouth pointed naturally downwards, she must have gone through a lot. What cought Hongjoong's attenction the most were her lips though. They had a much too familiar shape, and now that he thought of it, her skin tone also looked like... Like Seonghwa's.

"You are the boy my son kissed right?"

Hongjoong stared at her afraid of what to say. Would Seonghwa be in trouble if he said yes? But wait, she knew? Holy shit, did Seonghwa's father know too?

She looked down at her hands there were now on her lap.

"You seem like a good guy, I'm happy Seonghwa found someone like you... My husband's a dick and I'm trying to divorce him but there are a lot of legal matters that should be taken into consideration and I- I just want my baby to be safe..."

Hongjoong stayed silent. The concrete of the sidewalk was still pushing onto his knees, and probably on Seonghwa's mother's too.

She lifted her head up, looking at his eyes, and took one of his hand in hers.

"He's at my sister's. His father doesn't know. I know you came to us to check on him, so please, stay by his side. He needs someone and I know he wouldn't have risked his life like that if he didn't care about you. Please, please, do not give up on him."

He found himself nodding to her. What did she mean with Seonghwa risking his life...?

She handed him a small piece of paper she took put from her pocked and stood up.

"I have to return home, he will be suspicious." She glanced at Hongjoong one last time. "Thank you for making Seonghwa smiled again."

And she was gone, walking back in the direction she probably came from, leaving Hongjoong kneeled on the ground, piace of paper in hand, worry and gratefulness flooding through his veins.