𝑚 𝑒 𝑡 𝑎 𝑛 𝑜 𝑖 𝑎 // JJK x reader

𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟏𝟑

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The remains of your Katana landed on the sofa with a soft thud as Choso's eyes shot open, the realization slowly sinking in that there really was no hope for you. He felt you – And yet it seemed as if he was wrong thinking you were still alive. 

"As I told you – She's dead." Kenjaku strode towards the door after leaving the Katana on the spot he threw it on the couch. Choso's figure slumped down, his face now buried in the palms of his hands.

"Choso, I know she meant a lot to you, but now you have closure at least." 

Kenjaku's arm rested on the doorknob as he looked back at him, his eyes studying Choso's miserable expression when he peeked up through his fingers. "I'm sorry." he muttered, and as if on queue, his eyebrows pinched together. He was astonished at his sudden statement that apparently left his mouth without his approval.

He wasn't one to express his feelings towards others, neither should he possess any of them. Maybe Suguru Geto's body was the reason that he suddenly felt pity. He was lost in thought, his gaze still on Choso's face when he noticed his shocked stare.

Choso was baffled, he never reckoned that Kenjaku would be acting so human towards him. 

"Did you see her body?" Choso mumbled into his hands, his voice brittle and anyone could have seen how much this was breaking him on the inside. "No. I found her weapon outside the curtain in the woods."

"Okay." he stammered the thin whisper through his fingers, holding back the tears that were about to roll down his cheeks. The door shut behind Kenjaku with a light click, and Choso slumped back into the couch, his knees pulled up to his chin and his gaze was empty.

The tears silently travelled down, leaving wet trails on his cheeks as he slowly but surely lost his mind at the pain that was radiating through him. The aching heart that broke into a million pieces at the thought of you also leaving him utterly alone in this mess of a world.

He wanted to leave everything and everyone behind – The only thing that held him there with Mahito, Jogo and Kenjaku was you. He didn't care about the others at all. All he could think about was you, your scent, your face – And your smile and how he'd never be able to see it again. 

His body was shaking as he was sobbing alone in the big room, it was already night and it was dark outside and inside. In his body, his mind, his heart and in the space surrounding him. There was no light that could have guided him.

You were the light – And now you were gone. 

The suffocating silence around him was getting unbearable and he jumped up, his cheeks wet as he burst through the door and just ran. He ran until he couldn't do it anymore or until he was stopped. Either by death or any other thing that could take his pain away.

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You contemplated fighting him as a loud sigh left your lips and you set your gaze on Nanami again after avoiding meeting his eyes for the last few seconds. There was no way you'd be in the state to win that fight, no weapon in sight and still injured. 

"May I ask you another question before I introduce myself?" you inquired, tilting your head with a wry smirk plastered on your face. The dim light of the room flattered his features and you saw his expression getting wary, but he responded nonetheless. 

"Go on." He gestured you to continue, and you averted your gaze out the window. "Who is that white-haired clown who I had the pleasure to meet today?" you scowled quietly, but met his eyes again, questioning. 

"Did he harass you?" he asked in a serious tone, even though his voice was still soft. You huffed a small breath upon talking. "Not sexually – No. But his whole presence was kind of...," you searched for the right term, "...troubling." You scrunched your nose at the memories of his manners and rolled your eyes. 

Nanami mirrored you and a small smirk curled his lips upwards, which made your lazy smile a little bigger. 

"That was Satoru Gojo."

Your jaw dropped open at what you heard and a quiet gasp made you put your hand up to your mouth. "You mean to tell me, that this dick-," you shook your head, correcting yourself, "I mean, that dimwit is THE six eyes Gojo Satoru?!" 

He chuckled lowly at your words, nodding slightly and your eyes widened even more. 

"Now, would you tell me who you are?" he inclined his chin and raised his brow at you once more when you were still taking in what he just told you.

"Y/N." Your response was short and sweet and you didn't even want to explain any further, if it wasn't too much that you had told him already by revealing your name. Now the damage was done and you couldn't take back your words anymore. 

To your surprise, he didn't ask any more questions and just let it be with a polite smile on his lips. "Nice to meet you, y/n." You bowed slightly, returning his smile and you couldn't believe your own thoughts in your head when you hesitated; actually hesitated to steal and leave them behind.

You needed that cursed object to get back home, but they were all so nice it felt wrong to be a thief in that kind of environment, where they support each other and just genuinely liked each other – for the most part. 

That was just so different than what you were used to, the constant challenge of who was the strongest and who did what better than the others. You were used to the daily insults that you learned to not let them get to you, or the caution to stay hidden all the time. 

Choso was the only one that seemed to really care about you in all of the things you lived through together – The others left you eventually, in battle or when you drowned in guilt and your own feelings. They were never there, and they didn't even want to be there. 

But even though it was not healthy, and it wasn't a life that was based on mutual respect for each other, you cherished it – because it was the only life you had in these last few years.

And you thought a life that was built on appreciation and love was not something you deserved anymore after all these things you had done. Or more the things you had to do, to be the closest you could ever get to a having 'family' or 'friends'.