"I have NO PATIENCE for dinosaurs"

BORED GAMES

When writing, it can be hard to attribute the correct name to the right character, otherwise the flow can be stopped and you're left feeling awkward and kicking your heels in embarrassment.

This next story is case in point. I have decided to call them John and Jeff, though even now, knowing more than you do, do not feel the names...appropriate. I just thought you might like to know.

Jeff was bored.

The type of bored you get to when you know there's thing to do, if you could only think of them, but he really couldn't be bothered. I know that sounds a terrible thing to say, but sometimes its true. Sometimes, you just can't be bothered, especially when you've been busy for a while, weeding out the little jobs, completing all the bigger ones, ignoring the mundane ones and it just gets to the point...when...you say to yourself "you know what?... I just can't be bothered."

Jeff was having one of those days.

He wandered around his house trying to find things not to do and succeeding quite well, though it was starting to get the better of him. He realised that, even though he felt like it, the effort to make a cup of tea was beyond him. He sat down with a thud into his favourite, deep, square, leather armchair, that admittedly had seen better days, and that was before he found it discarded while out on a stroll one day.

He looked at a crack in the upholstery on one of the arms, the flattened stuffing starting to show through and absentmindedly, picked at a little bit of fluff. He wanted to do something, he was feeling a bit fed up with working so hard lately, but he wanted a rest.

He looked at the phone. The phone tried to ignore him. Perhaps he'll go away. Jeff looked at the phone some more and then it came to him.

He lurched forward and dialled.

The phone rang...and rang...and rang...

"Hello?" came the voice from the other end, sounding like he'd been disturbed doing something and confused who might be calling at this time of day, at the same time.

"Barry! Hi, it's Jeff!" said Jeff with enthusiasm, which surprised even him.

"Oh, er, hi Jeff," said Barry, definitely being interrupted "Er, how's you? Not talked for a while."

"I'm bored Barry" said Jeff, finding the phrase funny whilst ignoring pleasantries and not being too good at social interaction.

"Thanks for that. Nice to know who you can turn to when you feel...bored" Barry replied, trying not to sound interrupted...or hurt.

"Bazza, look, come on over, lets have a game of something. We haven't played Monopoly in ages."

Barry was silent for a moment, remembering "And why haven't we played in ages?" he asked.

It was Jeff's turn to be silent. "Ah, Steve can't help it." He replied.

"Jeff, he cheats at every game we play, what do you mean "He can't help it?""

Jeff thought, then said "Okay, I won't invite Steve."

"Really? You won't ask Steve to come?"

"Nah, it'll be fine, we can play something else, Mastermind or something. Ooh, Battleships." Jeff said, trying to make Barry happy, which was always a task in itself. Jeff always felt like the middle man.

"But Steve'll find out, then he'll get pissed with us."

"Oh, you're such a worrier Baz. It'll be fine. Trust me."

The thought hung in the air as Barry recalled the last time Jeff had told him to "trust" him. It turned out to be a very expensive weekend and it took him ages to get the stains out of his clothes.