It's Always Been You

 Hallucinations

(Y/ns pov)
As we reached the top floor I was first and Miller stepped in front of me "Miller get out of my way." He turned towards Bellamy who gave him a nod and he stepped aside me Clarke and Octavia come up and I walk up to the grounder "hey I know you have no reason to help us because we did kinda kidnap you but please tell me what was on that knife and how I save Finn." He didn't answer "please he's my best friend." Still no answer Clarke stepped in front of me "tell us now." She said sturn but still no answer.

Bellamy began hitting him with a belt Raven came up too "y/n Finn stopped Breathing!" I turned to her "what!" She took a breath "he started again but next time he might not." I shook my head "well he's not talking." She scoffed "wanna bet." She started pulling out some wires and shocked him finally Octavia spoke up "STOP." We all turned to her "O he's letting Finn die." Bellamy spoke "he won't let me die." She took the knife from Clarke and cut herself then started pointing at the vials the grounder nodded she picked it up took a sip then handed Clarke the vial and her and Raven ran back down to Finn Octavia and I stayed.

"You guys should go." Bellamy said "I'll go when you stop hurting him Bell he saved me." Octavia began I didn't protest I just went down back too Finn.

When morning came Clarke and Bellamy left on some sort of day trip I was eating some of the rations I went to check on Finn and he was awake talking to Raven "hey there superstar." Finn said i laughed at the nickname "hey Fishy." He laughed at his own nickname "how you doing?" He smiled "I've been better." I smiled "well I'll leave you and Raven to it." I say as I leave the drop ship as time goes by people started acting weird and I started seeing things horrible things like my biggest fears Bellamy dying and Finn even Raven I was curled up on the ground my head in my knees and I was shaking so bad I hadn't even noticed that Finn and Raven were out of the drop ship yet I still had these hallucinations.

I wanted them to go away but they wouldn't I was absolutely terrified it all happened so fast and I kept seeing the same things over and over again Bellamy was always the first to die then it was Finn then Raven Bellamy died by a gun shot and Finn died by being stabbed repeatedly and Raven died by both except I'm the one that pulls the trigger on Raven she begged me too so I did it was on a loop playing over and over in my head.

Nothing stopped it not closing my eyes or even thinking about happy things nothing but finally it stopped I had sobered up it was dark now and I saw Finn and Raven was talking to someone I went up to Finn "hey what the hell is going on?" He asked me "I have no idea I think the rations went bad." He nodded "did you hallucinate too?" I nodded not wanting to talk about it.

Finally it was light and everyone was sober Bellamy and Clarke came back and were going on about how we have guns now and that they aren't toys and that we need to be prepared to give them up when the gaurd gets here I really wasn't paying much attention "THE GROUNDER IS GONE!" Miller came running from the drop ship yelling Bellamy and Clarke ran into the drop ship this only means one thing Octavia set him free.

At some point people began working on the wall again it was basically done but still needed a few touches Finn was already doing better and Bellamy came over to me after speaking with Jaha "guess who's going to live when the ark comes down." He says "uhm Monty." I say teasingly "no me." I smile "well that's great." He nods "hey you alright?" Was I? I don't know maybe I was maybe I wasn't "yeah I'm good." That was a complete lie and he knew that but didn't push it "okay." He slid his arm around my shoulders and I liked it.

"You know there's something I need to talk to you about." He looked down at me "okay what's up?" Here goes nothing I'm going to tell Bellamy how i feel "Bellamy I-" I got interrupted by Murphy coming in the walls frantically and he didn't look good a few weeks ago we banned him from camp after he tried to kill Charlotte who killed wells who also was going to let him get hanged.

Bellamy let go of me and ran over "oh hell no what are you doing here!" Murphy didn't say much "the grounders took me and tortured me then left the door open so I ran." Murphy then started coughing up blood Clarke took him into the drop ship then the two guys that helped him in began to do the same and into the drop ship they went no one else came into close contact with him but that didn't matter people were getting sick Clarke was quarantining people.

"I'm sorry y/n can we talk about this later?" Bellamy asked "yeah yeah that's fine I'm gonna go find Finn and Raven." I left to go find them when I did they were in a tent raven was making something "is now a bad time?" Finn opened his mouth to say something but Raven prevented him "yes." I nodded and went to leave "hey no y/n stay and Raven what the hell happened between the two of you?" Before I could say anything Raven did "she's in love with you that's what happened she knew I liked you and still fell in love with you." Finn laughed "Raven no she's not in love with me she's in love with Bellamy." I hit Finn in the arm "wait what?" She turned to face us "yeah Raven it's true I've loved him since I was 13." She felt stupid and I knew that "oh my god I feel like such an idiot I ended out friendship for nothing." I smiled "no no raven it's okay back then if you would've listened to me you would've known." She laughed "I should listen to you more often." I nodded and she got up and hugged me I missed her "friends?" She asked "friends." I smiled and pulled away from her at this point Finn was gone.

"So what are you building?" She sighed "a bomb to blow up the bridge you wanna help?" I nodded "do I have you met me?" She laughed "I knew you would come on." We built the bomb but more and more people were getting sick so Clarke asked for my help in the drop ship even though I was an engineer I knew some about medicine so I helped her as much as I could we stepped out of the drop ship and Bellamy came racing over "y/n what were you doing in the drop ship!" Before I could respond Clarke did "I asked her to help there's to many of them I can't do it alone." Bellamy clearly didn't agree but didn't protest.

"And we need t-" Clarke almost hit the ground but Finn caught her "Finn no don't touch her!" Raven yelled but it was too late he brought Clarke into the drop ship and I went in to follow but Bellamy grabbed my hand "hey I don't like this but please just be careful." I nodded "I will be bell." Then went into the drop ship I heard Bellamy mumble but didn't catch what he said as time went on some people ended up dying next thing I knew I was helping someone along with Murphy and Octavia then some guys brought some in "y/n!" I turned it was Bellamy "no no bell! Okay uhm set him here." They did then left I got him some water and placed my hand on his cheek. "Hey it's okay you're going to be fine i promise." I wiped some of the blood from his mouth "how are you so sure?" He questioned "I'm not going to let you die you hear me." He nodded then passed out shit I hoped everyone would get better soon the blowing up the bridge will only last for a few days and I needed these people better.