I made a decision to focus on family, determined to believe and have faith that all else would follow. I wasn't comfortable, or good, at lying to her.
So, one day when Samantha swallowed her pride and surprised me by asking, straight out, had anything happened during our break...I paused to gather my thoughts. The silence I believed said it all, and I was on the verge of spilling the details when she gave me my reprieve: She stated, "If you tell me nothing happened, I'll believe you."
I should have told her then or committed to never, rather than revealing it to her all those years later as I left for the final time. It was a selfish act, where by revealing, I hoped to push her away. But for the time being, instead, I let her believe what she clearly had wanted to hold on to—that I had remained faithful. She knew Pippa and probably sensed that something existed between us, but she let it go, and so did I.
Cowardice, I know, but I made up my mind to make it up to her. Our dream could still be. And for a while, it lasted, but fast-forward through the births of our three additional sons, and more than a dozen years later, those same problems from before had grown and would soon spiral out of control.
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Navel Gazing
Non-FictionI didn't want to be without her... Her beautiful face, infectious smile, her long, lean body, and the way she made me feel. But as time passed, and in the cruel way that familiarity and knowledge can sometimes work together against your dreams, the...
