The Notorious Villains Saves the World

Deception 1

"Shizun," he whispered, "how were you able to accept everything?"

"I just did." He just accepted it and lived with it.

Luo Binghe breathed hard and pulled Shen Yuan into an embrace. "Shizun, I am glad. The one I fell in love with was you."

He really does.

He will always love him.

Even if Shen Yuan cannot.

"For the things you've suffered before coming here... for the things you had to do to enjoy life... I have always taken everything from you." Luo Binghe cried, "Why? You should have just killed me to be free. Why would you go try protecting me and helping me at that time? I am possessive. I long for you, Shizun. But hearing this... everything... made me feel so pathetic."

Because he took that freedom to live over and over again.

"I love you. I really do. Shizun." But he couldn't help but cry for all the wrongs he had done to this man.

If not for this person, he wouldn't be who he is now. He killed the original Shen Qingqiu but he's keeping this Shen Qingqiu. He couldn't find the words to say. He wanted to apologise and, at the same time, rejoice.

"I thank Shen Yuan for changing my life."

A life not devoid of warmth and comfort. A life still attached to the world. He was happy this person came to his side.

"Shizun, do you fear me?"

"I do not."

"What do you think of me, Shizun?"

"I... trust you, Binghe."

Moments, sadness, Luo Binghe couldn't name it anymore. "You have suffered enough, Shizun, both by fate and by my side."

"I've never suffered from you."

"You do." You always do but Luo Binghe cannot let him go.

"Shizun..." His voice trembled. "Shizun, did you know? My memories started the time you gave me that bottle of medicine and told me to get stronger." Watching him stay with him no matter the reason. Watching him selflessly gave his freedom in order to fulfill his selfish wish. Lou Binghe understood he can never make him happy. It wasn't the same devotion Lan Wangji have for Wei Wuxian nor Xie Lian's resolute trust for Hua Cheng. It was fear, it was madness—what his Shizun have for him is submission. To be with him to avoid greater chaos. His Shizun stood by side to protect the world from him

He, who risked everything for him. He, who loved him the most. He, who is different right now, is willing. He was happy that his Shizun willingly came with him. Now, it's his turn to willingly let go of him. After all, Shizun shines the most when he is free. He finally understood what it means to love. It's not selfishness or obsession, love is free and open. He had been caging this person by his side.

He could still remember Lan Wangji's words, "his happiness is my happiness." He too, can also do it, right? He can. He will. All for his Shizun to do the things he always wanted. For him have the things he can never have when he's with him. This Shen Qingqiu never told him how he really feels.

"This disciple thank Sizhun for everything." For that affection, for the care, and for all those years he willingly suffered to remain by his side. "You can go now Sizhun..." He can chose now, he will no longer force him to chose. "You can be the way you want now ." He can be happy now, he will make sure he'll save the world that made his Shizun happy, "please remember that this disciple, love Shizun so much."

"Binghe." He smiled. His ever soft smile that is for this person only. He will never regret this. He will never regret letting him go. Xie Lian, Lan Wangji and his Shizun love the world. He, who cared for nothing is willing to protect it for them to live a happy life.

Just as Hua Cheng chose to protect the world for Xie Lian. Just as Wei Wuxian resolve to protect the future. He too, for the sake of this person, he will care for the world once and disappear afterwards. He promised himself not to make this person sacrifice more than what he already did.

"Shizun can go back to Cang Qiong Peak now. I am now..." There were tears. Tears on his eyes. He didn't mean to let this childishness displayed before him. He wanted to walk away with a smile but instead, tears were rolling down on his cheeks. "Alright." How he loved this person so much. "You've hurt far enough for my sake... I want Shizun happy."

Luo Binghe gave him a smile. Cupping Shen Yuan's cheeks, he'll take it. He understood everything. The things this person did for him. The things this person did for him to reach this. For this person to change his view and his life.

He was beyond happy.

He turned a blind eyes on everything for his selfish love but never he understood this man. When what this man willing did for everyone and for him. What this man did for everyone.

"LUO BINGHE!" he snapped awake and found himself kneeling in front of Shen Yuan. "Binghe."

He still couldn't let go.

"I told you! This Shizun is willing... So stop... Tormenting yourself."

"do you love me Shizun?" He asked.

It was enough for him. Enough fir everything to stop with this simple question.

"Because I love you so much, that I don't want to this willingness you gave make miserable..." Luo Binghe said, "you... Never loved me."

"You will never love me."

..to be continued...