𝐂𝐑𝐀𝐕𝐄𝐃│✔

𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝟏𝟕

"I'm heavy."

Mother and the servants always nagged at me whenever a dress was too tight around the hips or chest. No matter how starved and fit I was before, once the marriage agreement between me and the Feather Clan was confirmed they started to serve me dishes I had never tasted before, as many as three times a day. My stomach was overwhelmed at first, leading me to throw up a couple of times a day. I got used to it over time, but then my body started to change. My breasts became large, my hips seem to have grown wider and my tight thicker. I didn't think much of it, not until men started to look at me and Mother started to nag that no man would want me looking like this.

"Don't be ridiculous, you barely weigh enough."

Passing the French door at the back of the West Wing, Ezra carries me until we reach my hall where she finally lets me get off her back.

"Do you want me to call for your maid?" She says with her hands on both sides of my shoulders to keep me from tumbling over. My eyes staring up at her half-open. I wish I looked like her. I don't know what it is about her specifically. It's just that the shiny black hair, the scarless skin, honest black eyes, the stern yet gentle expression she carries. All of it is just so...

"Pretty!" I smile, letting my head rest against the wall behind me for support. I'm so exhausted, I realise then, so incomprehensibly exhausted. And then, again, I smile when I feel the nice softness of warm lips pressing against mine. Softly at first, then more determined, they move against mine, that move lazily with them. I go with the flow of the moment when one of the hands that grabbed my face into the kiss, moves downwards to firmly grab my breast. The soft moan I let out gives her enough space to deepen the kiss. Soon, we find ourselves entangled in with one another in the middle of the hallway. Tongues stroking, hands roaming. The feel of her hand groping my behind makes me grind against her to feel more.

More touched.

More wanted.

More.

When her other hand disappears under my dress to fondle with my underwear, I gain enough confidence to dare touch her like she touches me. And she freezes. Her tongue and hands retracting to look build some space between us and look down. I frown in confusion, my head cleared up from any after effect of the alcohol that worked magic on me until now. In the heat of the moment, my impatient made me forget to hold back like I normally would. Different times. Different people. Same mistake. Backing up a bit further, I breath out to slow down my heart-rate and growing excitement. My clawed fingers hiding behind my back.

"It's late," I speak soberly, "You should go." Sensing the walls rebuilding around me, she tries to approach me again, but I'm already at my door and more than ready for this horrible day to be over.

"Pandora-"

"Ezra, it's okay, really. I need to rest, so you go back and enjoy the rest of the night." Without another exchange, I find refuge within the lonesomeness of my room. Walking towards my vanity, I frown when seeing my messy reflection. The bird nest that was once braided neatly to one side, the fading blush on my cheeks and puffiness of my eyes make me a sight to behold. It was a mistake, that catastrophe that took place a second ago. I shouldn't have crossed that line with her without thinking about the consequences it'll have for the future. I let out a long breath and finally change into my nightgown. I went there to lift up my mood, yet I feel more than ever.

I need sleep. And let the sky fall on the next person to disturb me. With that in mind I lift the fluffy covers of my oasis. A streak of orange sunlight falling upon them makes me smile in reassurance.

It's dawn.

The time where all that happened the day before evaporates into the chances of a new day. The peace while the mortal realm slowly wakes up. My sleep pushed to the back of my mind, I stride to the balcony, and sit on the balustrade. My feet hanging high above the ground, the presence of Sol somehow manages to make me feel less alone than before. He's by now well used to my silent company, since sitting at the edge of the balustrade of my balcony back at home is something I've done countless times before. Younger me used to be petrified, at first, of looking down to notice how far she was from everything and everyone.