Chapter 5 - Peter Pan

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I left Emma and Regina to talk and went back to the cave, finding Killian admiring the drawings on the cave wall. We were standing back in the small space, talking, when everyone came back in, lighting more torches and continuing the search. I pushed off and away from him and as I neared Neal's makeshift bed Killian came up behind me and asked if I wanted a hand with the mattress. When I questioned if he was making a joke he assured me he was being serious, as he grabbed one end of the bed and assisted me in moving it, revealing tons of tally marks, marking the days Neal had been trapped here. Emma came over and analyzed them, giving her declaration about counting until counting seemed pointless, she would know, she did it too every time she went to a new foster home. Seeing the marks made her worry even more about Henry, about how long he'd been here, thinking we weren't fighting to get him back. 

I found myself speaking up without having decided to do so, mentioning my own experience with hopelessness when I found out my whole life had been a lie and the person I'd thought was my mom wasn't, and how after everything I'd gone through the one hope I had was a family that was taken away from me in an instant.

Emma got an idea then, realizing what Pan had meant with his last threat when he'd popped up and mouthed off some more cryptic nonsense. She wanted to send a message to Henry, somehow, so he didn't lose help. Everyone agreed and decided to leave the cave and go back to camp. 

As everyone was leaving Killian stepped in front of me as I was midstep, making me nearly run into him. He seemed different, more serious than I'd seen him, and he ran a hand down my arm until his fingers reached mine, brushing against them. He told me he, too, knew what it felt like to lose hope. His voice had been lowered, as if he wanted only me to hear his words, and he had this look in his eye I couldn't quite place. I asked if he was trying to bond with me, and he asked if that was his intention if it was working. I sidestepped away from him and walked out of the cave without answering, noticing David still standing there in the cave with us, having watched the entire encounter.

If my face hadn't already been flushed, it was definitely scarlet red as I walked past him. When I cast a look behind me I noticed he had stepped in front of the pirate, blocking his way, and could only imagine what he would be telling him.

Once back at our camp Snow showed us how to weave the rope to make the trap for the Lost Boy, which was their plan on how to get a message to Henry. Killian and I exchanged several, probably quite obvious, glances as I helped everyone make the trap. Whatever David had told Hook, it had gotten to him because he was brooding in the corner and had taken several swigs from his flask. Snow told David we needed more rope and David ordered "the pirate" to come with him. 

When Hook got sassy and talked back to David, questioning why he needed to go, I sassed right back that he needed to go because we needed more rope, as he heard Snow say. He threw in a little bow and an "If the lady insists," flask still in hand, at me and got up to follow David, keeping eye contact with me much longer than necessary. If nobody else noticed David had, rolling his eyes in response to the pirate's theatrics.

Oh no, is that where I get it from??? *existential crisis mode*

Snow, Emma, and even Regina all turned to me then with pointed looks but I just pretended not to notice and kept working on the knots for the trap for the Lost Boy. Nobody actually said anything, but their stares said everything they wouldn't. 

Hook came back with David about twenty minutes later speaking of a sextant that could help us get off the island. Ready to get a move on and do something useful I was eager to get moving but Hook put a hand on my arm, telling me Emma was right about getting a message to Henry being important to prevent him from becoming a Lost Boy, and that every day without hope brought him closer to it. He and my father would go after the sextant, alone. I was suspicious of the timing but if David thought it was a good idea, who was I to argue? He and Hook hadn't gotten along thus far, maybe this little excursion would do them both some good.  

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