There Is No We

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"I still think I should call the police."  The woman hands you a mug of warm coffee and you accept it gratefully. 

After noticing you on the street, she brought you into her home without a second thought, giving you a blanket and something warm to drink.  She told you her name is Anita, and at this moment, you're convinced she's a god-send. 

"It's really not necessary.  I just have to get moving again soon."

"It's only going to get colder, dear, and you're not fit to be out there right now.  The train station won't be open until early tomorrow."

Damnit.  "You're sure there's no late night trains or flights?"

She shakes her head.  "Not around here.  The town is small, we barely have use for the train station as it is.  People rarely come or go."

You ponder her words, debating your options.  She's probably right that you wouldn't make it far like this.  You need warmer clothes, or at a minimum, shoes, and during your run you didn't notice any shops that looked open.  Save from breaking into one, which might prove difficult with bo supplies, you'll have to wait until daytime.

"You're welcome to stay on the couch tonight," Anita pours you some more coffee.  "But I insist we go to the police station tomorrow."

You nod, playing along for now.  "Okay.  Thank you."  You need somewhere to stay tonight, and if making one promise you'll have to break is the price, you'll pay that in a heartbeat.

Anita sets you up with a blanket and pillow on her couch, and even gives you a warm pair of socks.  Her kindness is astounding to you, and you even try to warn her against letting people in her home off the street.  Kindness like hers is almost always taken advantage of eventually (by people like you, you suppose). 

It's nerve wracking to be sitting in one place when what you really want to do is keep running, but your eyelids are heavy and you figure it can't hurt to rest for just a couple hours.

Pet.

Where are you?

Pet!

WHERE ARE YOU?

You wake up in a start, sitting straight up.  Your heart is racing, was that a real voice?...

Shit.  You can feel it now.  He's back, and he knows you're gone.  He's looking for you.

You jump up, trying to navigate through the living room in the dark quietly.  With a regretful look back into the house, you slip Anita's shoes and coat on, promising yourself you'll find a way to repay her someday.

You run down the street, trying to remember her directions to the train.  You're not sure if it's even open right now, but it's your only feasible option.

You're an impressively fast runner, but you can feel Loki's presence in the back of your mind and you know if he knows where to look, he can be much faster.  You force yourself to steady your heart and clear your mind.  You need it to be as difficult for him to find you as possible. 

Finally, you make it to a large field white with frost.  From here, you can see the lights of the train station, alive and active, at the far side.  You're almost there.

You dash your final sprint toward freedom, daring to feel hope once you get about halfway across.

This is it.  Freedom.  Sky.  Sun.  Freedom. .  Anything you want.  This nightmare turned dream turned heartache is over.

Your body freezes suddenly and you're forced to stop by a power not your own.  Your paralyzed body is whisked backward by an invisible force, the lights of the train station growing further away.

No, no no! You're so fucking close.  This can't be happening, not now.

You're immediately crushed in the strong embrace of Loki, and your body unfreezes.

"You're okay."  His voice isn't angry like you expected, it's... scared. 

You're trembling from the cold, exhaustion, and fear.  Fear of how he might retaliate, fear of losing this one chance, and fear of how much you're letting yourself sink into his arms right now. 

"I thought... I didn't know where you were.  I told you it wasn't safe."  Loki is holding you against himself like you weigh nothing and his warmth is intoxicating.  Tears of frustration sting your eyes and you try to fight with what's left of your energy.

"Let me go, please let me go."  You sob into his shoulder, as if begging has ever gotten you anywhere with him.

"You want to go?"  He sounds genuinely surprised, and hurt at your request.  "We're going to go home, pet."

Frustration warms your blood at the tone in his voice.  Does he honestly forget how you ended up with him in the first place?  It doesn't matter how much you came to love it, or how much your heart is aching at the thought of losing him, because he's the reason any of this shit ever happened.  

"That. is. Not. my. Home."  Sparks of anger are igniting deep in your chest.  Loki's grip on you gets tighter and he actually shushes you.  You feel your body freezing again as green fog surrounds you.

Licks of flame erupt, and you focus your rage into every limb of your body.  You kick him square in the chest with a strength not fully your own, shattering his hold on you and throwing him flying backward in a violent cloud of green sparks.

You both hit the ground at the same time, but you jump straight to your feet while Loki sits up slightly, disbelief on his face. 

"How did you... why are you doing this?"  A scowl darkens his expression.  "I thought we..."

"There is no 'we', Loki.  There never has been."  You scowl back, only seeing his shocked and angry face staring at you, unaware that your irises are aglow with emerald streaks, illuminating your face.

Loki finally rises to his feet, anger swelling inside him visibly.

"Why?"  He yells across the field, pacing furiously.  "Why would you ruin this?  You could have anything you want!"

"I want freedom!"  You scream.  "I want my fucking life back!  No matter what you do, I'll never be happy as a prisoner.  Ill never stop trying to get out!"

"You think you're a prisoner?  You think our home is a prison?  No one on your entire planet lives as well as us there."

"It doesn't matter Loki!  It doesn't matter how nice it is if I can't leave.  It's still a cage!"

Loki's face is crumbling in front of you.  He throws his arms around, palms up, seemingly protesting with both you and the dark sky.

"I can't- listen to me," he finally stops pacing, leaning toward you, causing you to take several steps backwards. 
"I cannot lose anymore today, I can't lose you, pet-"

You scream your name as loudly as you can, your lungs burning and green sparks flying from your mouth.  "Say it, Loki!  Say my goddamn name!"

Loki stops pacing and instead stares at you from across the field.  You stare back defiantly.

When he says your name, his voice cracks.

Loki tries to fight his choked vocal cords as you wait, knowing he's trying to say words you'll never hear, because he'll never bring himself to say them.  You sigh.

"Let me go, Loki.  Or... At least give me a reason to stay."

He whimpers, but no words come.  The great god reduced to tears and fear of sentiments that he can't get out, even if they'd make you consider staying for even a second.  He's made his choice.

He turns away from you, one hand clutching his face.  That's enough for you to walk away, turning your back to him and what could have been.

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