Shattered Souls (BTS)

Chapter 23 - Madeline

His brown orbs snapped to her face, widening in disbelief. "Do you really think I wouldn't come to check on my friend who was in a coma? Ouch, Madi. That hurts." He played off his hurt with a flat joke.

"Sorry," She apologized, sincerely. She didn't even realize her questioning could offend him. She felt like a bad friend.

"As soon as you collapsed, I knew it had something to do with the soul suppressants. It scared me to death." He started rambling, letting his buried fears come to light. Madeline had been so stuck in her own world, that she didn't even ask about how Jensen was doing. He had witnessed her collapse and had probably brought her to the hospital. The fact he was here showed his concern.

"Watching that happen must have been terrifying," She muttered, swallowing the lump in her throat.

He gave her his complete attention to her and locked his intense eyes with hers, "Madi, I have something important to say to you. If I don't say it now, it'll eat me up. I'm so sorry for giving you those drugs. I rushed you into taking them. You didn't have time to think about it properly. You're in this hospital because of me."

Immediately, she was vigorously shaking her head, "No, that's not true. It was my decision. You didn't push me to do anything. I decided to take them. I wanted them. You were trying to help me."

A conflicted look flitted over his face, "I still shouldn't have mentioned them to you. I wanted to ease your suffering."

She wanted to lie and tell him that he did ease her suffering. But it felt wrong to conjure up a lie for a conversation like this. During that week on the pills, she felt like shit. Her brain was constantly fuzzing and there was an unbearable pain in her chest.

The whole reason she ended up in the hospital—aside from abusing the drugs—was because her soul was denying the drugs. It didn't want to break the bond. She hated that. Her mind was made up. Why did her soul have to make things difficult?

"I have something to admit," Madeline sucked in a shaky breath. "I was abusing the drugs. I was taking more than I should have."

Concern and disappointment flashed in his orbs. He sat up straighter at the news, genuinely surprised by the new information. "Y–you what? Madi, do you know how dangerous that is? Jesus Christ. Why would you do that?"

She was glad to hear there wasn't any anger in his voice. Only worry. Shouting at her wouldn't change the past nor would it help her road to recovery.

"Because I wanted to completely destroy the bond." She replied, bluntly.

In her mind, taking more drugs meant the bond would shatter into a thousand pieces. She didn't care about the effects on her soul. She didn't care that it was dramatic and crazy. She just wanted an escape.

Jensen struggled to find a reply. "I don't even know what to say." He admitted, stunned. "Aren't your soul mates here?"

This time, it was her turn to be surprised. What did he know about her soul mates? Had they met? Did he know who they were?

"How do you know about them?" She asked in a rush. She didn't want any more people to know who they were.

"I got Freya's number when you were rushed in. She told me they've been staying here with you. She hasn't told me a lot but she says they really care about you." He said, unintentionally stabbing her heart.

Madeline tilted her face away from him, trying to blank his words. "They don't. It's all a front."

She heard him sigh in exasperation, "How do you know that? What have they told you?"