Lost

Chapter 12 Jacquelyn

A few minutes later we ended up at what looks to be a hotel.

"We're staying in the city for a few hours?"

"Yes."

"Oh, well, I guess it beats sitting outside waiting for my flight for a few hours but still, it costs a lot of money to wait a few hours", I said. 

"I wanted to do this. It's up to you if you want this as well."

"Want what?"

"You'll see."

He leads the way inside. It looked pretty, well, fascinating inside. There were rooms that had different themes. 

"What in the world is this place Isamu", I asked with a giggle. 

"A place for couples."

"A place for couples...wait a minute... like to do..."

He didn't say anything further. With the room key in hand, he used his other hand to take mine. 

The only thing Isamu and I have done sexually is well, a bunch of make-out sessions and nothing past touching. My heart is racing at the thought that I will lose my v-card a few hours before my flight. What if I mess up though? I still have no idea what I'm doing at times. I want to make sure it's enjoyable for him too. 

"Here is our room", he said. 

"Wow!"

It was super pretty, maybe this is the elegant themed room or something. There was a huge chandelier hanging in the center of the room and beneath was a large round bed that had what looked like the fluffiest bedding on it. Across from that looked like a jacuzzi tub. The entire floor of the room was so shiny and clean, I was afraid to step on it as I still had my work clothes on. Everything looks so perfect here. 

"Want to take a shower first while I order something to eat", he asked. 

"Yes", I said happily. 

There was a walk-in shower around the corner of the jacuzzi that was huge. It felt amazing to have water shooting on me from every angle. I was worried about wasting water but I forgot where I am. This is my last day here, I'm going to enjoy every single bit. 

After the shower, I could not get enough of the water and so I got in the jacuzzi, great idea. I just about became a puddle of water as the jets massaged me all over. 

"Don't drown", Isamu came over to say. 

"I'm not, it just feels so good I could fall asleep."

"Mind if I join you?"

"I was hoping you would."

The jacuzzi was plenty big for both of us. I wasn't as shy being naked around him like the first time. I can't be right now anyway. I have to prepare for the big moment. 

"I can tell your mind is running like crazy", he said. 

"Huh?"

"We don't have to have sex if you don't want to. I just wanted to do one last getaway with you so I thought this would be something you like."

"O-Oh...well, yes this is amazing, way better than what I could have come up with. As for sex...I...I mean, we can try. I'm not quite sure what it feels like to be ready."

"I'm not a pro when it comes to that either but what they say is, you're supposed to have super strong feelings about the person."

"It only works that way if the other person feels the same way...b-but given our current situation, that might not be possible, which is okay."

"Usually more time is needed to help you decide how you feel about a person."

"That's true."

"There are rare times in which you already know how you feel when you first lay eyes on that person", he said. 

"Yeah, a lot of old people said they fell in love as soon as they laid eyes on each other. They end up staying married for like 100 years."

He let out a chuckle. 

"I can see that happening. You don't need much to know what your life would be like with someone. For some, they let you know right away that things will work out."

"Yeah, I guess that's true. I want to believe that and I feel like that could be me but, I don't have the best family history when it comes to successful relationships. My parents divorced when I was young and so I feel like maybe that's why I've never had any dating experience. I'm just cursed.

"The same with me. I've only ever dated maybe two or three times. They lasted for a decent amount of time but I never could fully commit because of my parents. Besides them budding into my relationship, my parents are not a good example of how it's supposed to be. On the outside, they look like the perfect loving couple but that's far from the truth. I've known about my mom and dad's affairs for a long time until I thought that was normal for people of my status to do. As I got older I learned that it's not normal to live that way. Eventually, I stopped dating since I was getting nowhere with it."

"Looks like we are more alike than different in that area as well", I said. 

"That's true."

"Well, at least I can say we like each other even though our relationship will be over after I board the plane."

"If that wasn't the case...how would it be", he asked. 

"Um...I don't know. I mean, I've thought about it. I've thought about how we would travel together and do all kinds of fun things. We might live in a small house like on the farm, maybe grow food, and have a bunch of chickens."

"Chickens?"

"Yeah, why not?"

He rolled his eyes with a light laugh. 

"And then what?"

I felt myself get shy as I continued on. 

"We would grow closer and maybe...eventually...", my voice grew quieter and quieter. 

"Fall in love", he said softly, finishing my sentence. 

"Yeah..."

"Maybe those feelings are there now but considering our background, we suppress those feelings back without realizing it", he said. 

"You think so?"

He shrugged. 

"It's up to you."

I suddenly moved forward, wrapping my arms around him. I closed my eyes as I spoke. 

"I love you Isamu. I'm so crazy in love with you...the thought of not seeing you ever again hurts..."

Even though they were just words I was spewing out, deep down it didn't feel like a lie. 

Why?

He became quiet. Instead of saying anything he took my face into his hands, moving in to kiss me. This time it was different. It was light and slow, he took time to build up the passion between us. 

I know now what I want. 

I want him and he wants me. 

For the rest of our stay there, I gave him all of me and so did he. I can say without a doubt this was the best vacation I ever had. I just wish this wasn't just a vacation but my new life. 

I wish it didn't have to end.