Brothers best friend

Going back

I woke up by the door in pain mentally and physically. I knew I messed up by doing what did. But I just was so broken seeing what I saw. I knew I need to apologize and just maybe make him forgive me. I loved since forever. Me and Riv always said we'd get married and have a family I still wanted that but does he.

I pulled myself up and cleaned myself up and went to check out. When leaving I checked my phone. E called all night. I decided to call him back.

E: hey Em you coming back?
Em: headed there now. I don't want to talk yet but I'm sorry. Please tell Riv I'm sorry ok. I am still so fucking in love with him. I can't forgive myself. I acted out instead of talking like they taught me. I want everything with him. Wait I'm not on speaker.
All the boys: we forgive you Em just come home.
Riv: please come home and talk to me.
Em: see you soon.

I stopped at Starbucks to get a refresher and a muffin. I braced myself for what was gonna happen.

I pulled up to the house and took a few breaths. I have to do this no more running. I am going to put it all. I'm not hiding anymore. I slowly got out of my jeep and started for the door. Once I opened it all the boys ran and hugged me. I broke down. "I'm sorry guys. I really am. E I'll never do it again. Ry and wy I'm sorry for yelling at you. And Riv I'm sorry for everything. God I still love you I haven't ever stopped. I want you to be happy but I'm selfish and only want you happy with me. All those promises we made I still want them. I'm sorry. " I shoved away and ran to my room.

I fell on my bed and shook. I said my truth. I just laid there wondering what will happen next. While in my thoughts a knock came at my door.

"Yes?" I asked. "It's Riv can I come in?" He asked. "Yea."

He came in shut the door rushed to kiss me. I felt the weight leave.