CHAPTER FIVE

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King's Landing was as awful as I remembered.

I could smell the shit, blood and death from the carriage. The sounds were even worse.

I unconsciously took a deep breath, regretting it the second the smell of rotten flesh reached my nostrils. Jacaerys turned to look at me, a smile making it's way through his lips, and left his hand on my left thigh, drawing circles as if he expected that to better the air inside and out the carriage.

Little Viserys moved on my lap, noticing our brother's warmth closer to him and making himself even more comfortable. He had his head on my chest, sleeping caresslesly and soundly, and his hands were holding the golden dragon egg with such a strength as if he was scared it would fall and break.

Mother and once uncle Daemon, now stepfather, sat across the carriage. Her hands on her once again swollen stomach, his in his sword belt. Dark Sister's pommel stared back at me with the same intensity I knew I stared at it, and I felt a shiver down my spine at the need of the valyrian steel cutting through my skin, the blood making it's way to the ground, the alcohol (wine was too sweet and the milk of the poppy was not an option) and my stepfather's hands almost roughly cleaning the new wounds. As if he expected me to flinch and beg him to stop.

Lucerys and Joffrey were next to them, playing with Egg and his wooden dragon that was once Luke's. Rhaena sewed, muttering things to herself or our mother, and briefly smiling at me from time to time as if she sensed my desperation for getting out of that carriage the sooner the better.

Why I wasn't allowed to fly to there was a mystery for me. A punishment, mother said. Apparently burning to ashes an abandoned place was not the best way of dealing with anger issues.

So there we were. From a ship to a carriage, almost a fortnight of voyage. I really wished my mother birthed a girl. Even with Rhaena's presence, I was getting tired of these boys.

Jace looked at me again, curling the corner of his lips up, and squeezed my thigh. He visibly panicked though, as Viserys lifted his head from my chest, frowning his brows in his direction. Even almost entirely asleep still, we both caught sight of the rogue glow in his violet irises. The same one staring at us from across the carriage, from the eyes that belonged to the older version of the baby in my arms.

"It's okay, little one. Go back to sleep." I muttered, running a hand down his silver hair.

It took us another two hours until we finally arrived at the Red Keep. I was not expecting a warm welcome, but I wasn't expecting not welcome at all.

Ser Harrold was the only person there. He bowed respectfully at my mother, who got out of the carriage with her husband's help, and briefly smiled at his eyes scanned the rest of us, taking his time as his blue irises found my lilac ones. I quietly chuckled when he narrowed them, and waved my hand as he bowed again.

Elinda, my mother's youngest and gentlest lady-in-waiting, took Viserys from my arms, picking him up in her own and grabbing Egg's hand after Rhaenyra and Daemon followed the knight somewhere I didn't care.

Jacaerys and Lucerys were fast to disappear as well, with only a brief smile and a quick kiss to Luke's brow as a goodbye. And my stepsister, insightful as her father, raised her eyebrow, winking at me before following the smell of the sea of letters above white pages on the library, ready to lose herself in old books.

I allowed myself to feel the freedom I had wished for in those countless days on my shoulders, smiling with all teeth and drumming the tip of my fingers on my thigh. What was there to do, if not eat?

The old kitchens were exactly as I remembered as well, the smell of bread and ham and sweet wine filling the room wherever you stood. Kitchen maids went and go, preparing meals for the lords and ladies and knights around.

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