37.Moh Maya Jee Ka Janjal

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Jo cheej tumhe rulati hai

Bas wahi to moh hai

- Osho









'One'

'Two'

'Three'

'Four'

'Five'

'Six'

And then another and last one as off now....

'Seven'....

And the seventh slap landed on Shehnaaz's red face...a little more harsh than the last one.

Her cheeks felt hot burning with heat with the high level of histamine in her body due to anxiety,stress ,fear and heplessness,her face flushed all red due to expansion of blood vessels inside her burning skin which was itching due to the same as some more hot set of fresh tears left her big black eyes.

She felt humiliated as she had never felt it before,she felt betrayed beyond words,cheated ,fooled,conned,bluffed and every synonyms of that kind suited her present situation.

She smirked on her innocence all these years which had turned in bitter annoyance that she felt on her...running from the reality and creating her own castle in her head,it was all an horrendous escape from reality,she realised it completely now,which was broken and how....no not castle actually...no castle or no prince she had dreamed in that context but considered it as a mere perfect illusion...like some' Maya' and the 'moh ' she had with that 'illusion' and it's associated 'attachment' felt lame...value less and had no meaning...It never had!

And thus we say...attachment is always painful...and love is always bliss!...LOVE sets us free,librates and strengthen us...it never breaks us 'mostly'...but attachment actually too much attachment does every sort of loss we can never imagine really when we are in it's trap,under some influence...or in illusion of it....and thus' Moh Maya 'is jee ka Janjal(Problems of heart) and nothing else...she lived this truth now.

And now she can differentiate between LOVE and ILLUSION for sure.

Illusion which she had for her teacher cum guide ,motivator and friend too...Samresh Vidyarthi!

She looked at her face...her sindoor which had come out of her hair line,her long black straight hair open as if crushed after opening up from her pigtail.Her bindi was missing probably fallen down somewhere.Her lips which were back in their original light pink color and were dry,chapped due to constant crying and torment on them by her and him as well.Her nostril flared with sadness and anger her hands closed tightly fisting on the mirror rack below.

She sighed and took a long breathe looking at the ceiling trying to soothe her heart but failed as tears again took their ways and her throat formed the lump again in order to cry....loudly ..so loudly this time....but she could not..Her stupidity has costed her so much...and it gonna cost more if she..........

What a fool she was...she is still.....

She laughed a little on her situation...she felt pity as few unknown tears came off her eyes without notifying her....she wanted to cry loud....yell at him...at her ..howl and scream at him and her from dragging her to such situation in her life currently...and the mistake which was done and now gonna never be erased and undo..ever!

And so those 7 slaps were needed to take her out from the 'Maya'...a maya which has become a janjal created by herself only....and so those 7 slaps she has gifted her ..herself with happiness and grace and it stung her cheeks but not more than her soul.Those 7 slaps on her cheeks which she has hit on her were not because of any frustration or anger only but out of guilt more...and off course helpness and mostly worry and fear!

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