Late Night Poet - My Bleeding Heart

Saving Me

Save me.

I am living with a narcosis.

I have no words to speak.

My mind crystalize.

Frozen, trapped in place.

You've isolated me.

In a house built on manipulation.

What I thought was love, I so blindly excepted.

Not knowing their was a knife behind your back.

You never really wanted me, just the light I bring.

You wanted my heart, that loves unconditionally.

But you never invested in me.

Using my words and fears against me.

How cruel is the person that you truly are?

4 years I give to loving you.

But not one day did you took the time, to wipe my tears away.

I felt so lonely, that's why I grew ill.

It turns out you feed my worst addictions.

You watched me fall apart.

All you do is gaslight my heart into flames.

For someone who's so emotionally unavailable.

Your feels are the only ones that existed.

If my emotions didn't make sense, it meant they weren't real.

When I asked you to listen so I could vent.

I needed to know you wouldn't blame me for my confusion, or my own emotions I didn't understand.

I asked you to try.

Your reply to me, I can't make any promises.

How did I not read between the lines.

I curse my mind for seeing all your potential.

I never once wanted to change you.

But to accept you flaws as you grew into who you are.

But vou made a fool of the love I gave to you.

You bleed my sore heart dry.

You pushed me away so far, this time I won't come back.

I've found something greater than you.

The person I am is a gift to others.

I will never stop being who I am.

I will succeed.

I will find a love more worthy of me.

Because I love whole heartily.

I love with out regret.

I will give all that I am.

I'll be a partner someone can rely on, no matter the struggle or storm.

All I ever asked you, was to accept me as I am.

I'm flawed, I wouldn't ever call myself perfect.

My imperfection make me who I am, I'm covered in buses and scars.

But I love myself, for living through the pain even when I wanted to fade away.

So thank you for reigniting this survivor's will, to rise and fight again.

I'll build a place to live, a palaces you can't comprehend.

I'll save myself instead.

-BM